Why are women still afraid to walk home at night?

by Syl Fri Mar 12, 2021 11:57 am

First topic message reminder :

"Fury and heartbreak following the disappearance of Sarah Everard has prompted people to declare "she was walking home" in solidarity with the 33-year-old.

Thousands of people have expressed fury that women often feel unsafe walking the streets alone after human remains were found in woods in Kent after Sarah went missing.

Sick of having to moderate their behaviour for fear of encountering predatory strangers, some have questioned if a curfew for men wouldn't be a better way of keeping women safe.

The outpouring comes as police say a vigil to "reclaim these streets" organised for Saturday in Sarah's name cannot go ahead due to lockdown restrictions.

One woman wrote on Twitter: "We know it's #notallmen but unless you can tell us how to quickly assess which ones it is, it's a pointless sentiment. #shewaswalkinghome#TooManyWomen"

Another quoted the author Margaret Atwood who famously said: "Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them."

Sarah Everard.

Why are women still afraid to walk home at night? - Page 5 0_pri110

by Maddog Fri Mar 19, 2021 10:57 pm

eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

Nah, lets just not tell people (especially women) they can't.

I make myself very clear, yet people continue to try to twist my words.

I’m not twisting your words. You made your own very solid reasons for guns to be carried by women.

Or not carried.

My own daughters don't carry (at least on their person), while their mother does at times. Both choices are fine as long as they have the choice.

I never said "Let’s all carry a fucking gun!”

by Didgee Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:00 pm

Ben Reilly wrote:What just still sticks in my craw about this topic is the idea that non-rapist men have some responsibility to change their ways or something in response to this tragedy.

I don't rape. If a friend of mine bragged he was raping women, I'd call the police, but criminals tend not to go around confessing to their crimes.

It's like anything else -- in the film Detroit, which eddie and watched the other day, black people are rioting in Detroit in 1967, and a black security guard tries to help police in any way he can. At one point, a white cop asks the black guy, "How long do you think they'll keep this up?" and the black guy rightly says, "How should I know?"

It's just wrong to link a bad behavior to something about the way you were born -- your race, your gender, your culture, your sexual orientation, whatever.

It's not just prejudiced, it's illogical. The fact I was born a white male American doesn't mean I'm going to do anything bad that some other white male Americans may do. I might do bad things that Indian Muslims may also do. I might do bad things that women may also do.

I think a better predictor of the bad things you might do is where you are in society -- rich people tend not to shoplift very much, whereas poor people rarely embezzle from large corporations.

And anyway, besides all that, I'm sure that rapists have heard people condemn rape. They don't rape because they've never been told it's wrong; they rape because there's something wrong with them that all the "Rape is wrong!" in the world can't fix.

The only thing that would truly help is to put more police on the streets.

Actually you are wrong Ben

We have a naturalistic instinct to be violent and harmful

Its socialisation that helps prevent this in humans

We are formed from the ape species and to ignore are violent nature is to ignore how to combat this problem

Humans are the most violent creatures to walk this earth

Its tare ability to socialise that has helped combat this violent nature found in many species

So are violent nature is formed from how all animals are born

Its a natural instinct of survival

The only difference is we have gained a moral conscience around this

by eddie Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:07 pm

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

Nah, lets just not tell people (especially women) they can't.

I make myself very clear, yet people continue to try to twist my words.

I’m not twisting your words. You made your own very solid reasons for guns to be carried by women.

Or not carried.

My own daughters don't carry (at least on their person), while their mother does at times. Both choices are fine as long as they have the choice.

I never said "Let’s all carry a fucking gun!”

Well, what you are you saying then, in a nutshell?

by Ben Reilly Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:11 pm

I think it's shitty to tell someone in this day and age, who's been brought up in modern society, that if you don't want to get attacked, you'd better carry a deadly weapon and be prepared to kill a person.

The whole point of civilization is to get away from that sort of shitty set of choices.

by Maddog Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:11 pm

eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

Or not carried.

My own daughters don't carry (at least on their person), while their mother does at times. Both choices are fine as long as they have the choice.

I never said "Let’s all carry a fucking gun!”

Well, what you are you saying then, in a nutshell?

That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.

They know better what sort of risks they are under at any given time. My daughters never walk in dangerous neighborhoods and never walk alone at night. They drive large vehicles and are safe with the exception of walking to that vehicle. But other women could live in a bad part of town. They could have a creepy ex that just won't leave them alone. I want them to have the choice to protect themselves.

by Maddog Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:13 pm

Ben Reilly wrote:I think it's shitty to tell someone in this day and age, who's been brought up in modern society, that if you don't want to get attacked, you'd better carry a deadly weapon and be prepared to kill a person.

The whole point of civilization is to get away from that sort of shitty set of choices.

No one is saying that.

STOP PUTTING FUCKING WORDS IN MY MOUTH. LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY, NOT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR.

by Ben Reilly Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:17 pm

Maddog wrote:
Ben Reilly wrote:I think it's shitty to tell someone in this day and age, who's been brought up in modern society, that if you don't want to get attacked, you'd better carry a deadly weapon and be prepared to kill a person.

The whole point of civilization is to get away from that sort of shitty set of choices.

No one is saying that.

STOP PUTTING FUCKING WORDS IN MY MOUTH. LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY, NOT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR.

Fair enough! I wasn't actually assuming that's what you meant, but rather addressing the idea, because my brain works in weird ways sometimes.

by eddie Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:17 pm

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

Or not carried.

My own daughters don't carry (at least on their person), while their mother does at times. Both choices are fine as long as they have the choice.

I never said "Let’s all carry a fucking gun!”

Well, what you are you saying then, in a nutshell?

That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.

They know better what sort of risks they are under at any given time. My daughters never walk in dangerous neighborhoods and never walk alone at night. They drive large vehicles and are safe with the exception of walking to that vehicle. But other women could live in a bad part of town. They could have a creepy ex that just won't leave them alone. I want them to have the choice to protect themselves.

“That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.”

I thought it was legal to carry a gun in every state in the US? What’s your point about politicians?

by Maddog Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:19 pm

Ben Reilly wrote:
Maddog wrote:

No one is saying that.

STOP PUTTING FUCKING WORDS IN MY MOUTH. LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY, NOT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR.

Fair enough! I wasn't actually assuming that's what you meant, but rather addressing the idea, because my brain works in weird ways sometimes.

Thanks, the world isn't binary. Computers are. I often come from a nuanced position that throws people off.

Or I'm just weird.

by Maddog Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:22 pm

eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.

They know better what sort of risks they are under at any given time. My daughters never walk in dangerous neighborhoods and never walk alone at night. They drive large vehicles and are safe with the exception of walking to that vehicle. But other women could live in a bad part of town. They could have a creepy ex that just won't leave them alone. I want them to have the choice to protect themselves.

“That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.”

I thought it was legal to carry a gun in every state in the US? What’s your point about politicians?

Not even close to legal. If you carry in the wrong state or the wrong place you are going to jail.

I wrote a pretty detailed explanation to Korbin on this thread about how women have a problem carrying legally, even here in Texas.

But this is also about women in the UK being able to protect themselves.

by Ben Reilly Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:30 pm

Maddog wrote:
Ben Reilly wrote:
Maddog wrote:

No one is saying that.

STOP PUTTING FUCKING WORDS IN MY MOUTH. LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY, NOT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR.

Fair enough! I wasn't actually assuming that's what you meant, but rather addressing the idea, because my brain works in weird ways sometimes.

Thanks, the world isn't binary. Computers are. I often come from a nuanced position that throws people off.

Or I'm just weird.

If I could explain how my brain worked just then, it would be something like, I know you don't necessarily think this but because this idea popped into my head, I now have to say something about it -- and strongly! I know it's weird.

by Ben Reilly Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:31 pm

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.

They know better what sort of risks they are under at any given time. My daughters never walk in dangerous neighborhoods and never walk alone at night. They drive large vehicles and are safe with the exception of walking to that vehicle. But other women could live in a bad part of town. They could have a creepy ex that just won't leave them alone. I want them to have the choice to protect themselves.

“That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.”

I thought it was legal to carry a gun in every state in the US? What’s your point about politicians?

Not even close to legal. If you carry in the wrong state or the wrong place you are going to jail.

I wrote a pretty detailed explanation to Korbin on this thread about how women have a problem carrying legally, even here in Texas.

But this is also about women in the UK being able to protect themselves.

Did the Supreme Court not rule that local jurisdictions can't place any tough regulations on handgun ownership?

by eddie Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:34 pm

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.

They know better what sort of risks they are under at any given time. My daughters never walk in dangerous neighborhoods and never walk alone at night. They drive large vehicles and are safe with the exception of walking to that vehicle. But other women could live in a bad part of town. They could have a creepy ex that just won't leave them alone. I want them to have the choice to protect themselves.

“That women should make the choice of whether to carry or not, not a bunch of politicians.”

I thought it was legal to carry a gun in every state in the US? What’s your point about politicians?

Not even close to legal. If you carry in the wrong state or the wrong place you are going to jail.

I wrote a pretty detailed explanation to Korbin on this thread about how women have a problem carrying legally, even here in Texas.

But this is also about women in the UK being able to protect themselves.

Okay, for the sake of argument, let’s imagine women everywhere, can legally carry a gun.

Do you suppose that would deter a rapist?

by Maddog Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:53 pm

eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

Not even close to legal. If you carry in the wrong state or the wrong place you are going to jail.

I wrote a pretty detailed explanation to Korbin on this thread about how women have a problem carrying legally, even here in Texas.

But this is also about women in the UK being able to protect themselves.

Okay, for the sake of argument, let’s imagine women everywhere, can legally carry a gun.

Do you suppose that would deter a rapist?

That's hard to say. I mean you might have to shoot the bastard to deter him. But in most cases the mere presence of a firearm would turn them around. In other cases, the women would freeze and he would get her gun, and he would do as he pleases.

But it's not like women don't point a gun at man every day in this country, and he learns some manners and starts behaving like an alter boy.

by eddie Fri Mar 19, 2021 11:55 pm

So carrying a gun is pretty useless then?

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 12:13 am

eddie wrote:So carrying a gun is pretty useless then?

How did you come to that conclusion?

by eddie Sat Mar 20, 2021 12:32 am

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:So carrying a gun is pretty useless then?

How did you come to that conclusion?

Because the threat of a gun doesn’t deter anyone who really wants to attack, does it?

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 12:44 am

eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

How did you come to that conclusion?

Because the threat of a gun doesn’t deter anyone who really wants to attack, does it?

But it's not like women don't point a gun at man every day in this country, and he learns some manners and starts behaving like an alter boy.

by eddie Sat Mar 20, 2021 12:59 am

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

How did you come to that conclusion?

Because the threat of a gun doesn’t deter anyone who really wants to attack, does it?

But it's not like women don't point a gun at man every day in this country, and he learns some manners and starts behaving like an alter boy.

No idea what you’re talking about. Care to tell me in plain english?

by Syl Sat Mar 20, 2021 1:27 am

Ben Reilly wrote:What just still sticks in my craw about this topic is the idea that non-rapist men have some responsibility to change their ways or something in response to this tragedy.

I don't rape. If a friend of mine bragged he was raping women, I'd call the police, but criminals tend not to go around confessing to their crimes.

It's like anything else -- in the film Detroit, which eddie and watched the other day, black people are rioting in Detroit in 1967, and a black security guard tries to help police in any way he can. At one point, a white cop asks the black guy, "How long do you think they'll keep this up?" and the black guy rightly says, "How should I know?"

It's just wrong to link a bad behavior to something about the way you were born -- your race, your gender, your culture, your sexual orientation, whatever.

It's not just prejudiced, it's illogical. The fact I was born a white male American doesn't mean I'm going to do anything bad that some other white male Americans may do. I might do bad things that Indian Muslims may also do. I might do bad things that women may also do.

I think a better predictor of the bad things you might do is where you are in society -- rich people tend not to shoplift very much, whereas poor people rarely embezzle from large corporations.

And anyway, besides all that, I'm sure that rapists have heard people condemn rape. They don't rape because they've never been told it's wrong; they rape because there's something wrong with them that all the "Rape is wrong!" in the world can't fix.

The only thing that would truly help is to put more police on the streets.

If you seriously think this isn't the responsibility for every man to look at his own behaviour, I think you have missed the point entirely.
Men who rape and murder, who assault any woman in any way are in the minority, we all know that.

Men who look the other way when women are being demeaned verbally by men, sadly are not.
You only have to look on any forum online to see that.....and that attitude sets the tone that makes many women feel vulnerable.

When a man refers to women as slags, slappers, bitches and worse online, can you imagine how a woman would feel if that was said to her as she walked alone at night?

I think it's worse now than at any time, time men realised this is everyones problem.....not just womens.

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 4:04 am

eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

But it's not like women don't point a gun at man every day in this country, and he learns some manners and starts behaving like an alter boy.

No idea what you’re talking about. Care to tell me in plain english?

The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time.

Nothing is guaranteed.

And I speak Texan, not English.

by Guest Sat Mar 20, 2021 7:15 am

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:

No idea what you’re talking about. Care to tell me in plain english?

The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time.

Nothing is guaranteed.

And I speak Texan, not English.

Remember when i said many Americans think a gun is the answer to every thing..... And you disagreed .........case in point

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 3:52 pm

Korben wrote:
Maddog wrote:

The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time.

Nothing is guaranteed.

And I speak Texan, not English.
Remember when i said many Americans think a gun is the answer to every thing..... And you disagreed .........case in point

It can be answer to an abusive male, not everything.

by Original Quill Sat Mar 20, 2021 5:29 pm

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:

No idea what you’re talking about. Care to tell me in plain english?

The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time.

It works in reverse: having a gun and the ability to threaten others redefines 'better behavior'. Let's say two men, one with a gun, approach a table with three gold ingots on it. Each man grabs one gold ingot.

Who gets the third?

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 5:32 pm

Original Quill wrote:
Maddog wrote:

The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time.

It works in reverse: having a gun and the ability to threaten others redefines 'better behavior'. Lets say two men, one with a gun, approach a table with three gold ingots on it. Each man grabs one gold ingot.

Who gets the third?

We're discussing stopping men who want to harm women.

by Original Quill Sat Mar 20, 2021 5:43 pm

Maddog wrote:
Original Quill wrote:

It works in reverse: having a gun and the ability to threaten others redefines 'better behavior'. Lets say two men, one with a gun, approach a table with three gold ingots on it. Each man grabs one gold ingot.

Who gets the third?

We're discussing stopping men who want to harm women.

You were discussing guns and "better behavior", not women. I believe your words were: "The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time."

You, alone, raised the discussion to the level of pure threat, and removed it from the context of "harm[ing] women". You can't 'open the door' to an issue, and then try to close it when you're about to lose the point.

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 5:57 pm

Original Quill wrote:
Maddog wrote:

We're discussing stopping men who want to harm women.

You were discussing guns and "better behavior", not women. I believe your words were: "The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time."

You, alone, raised the discussion to the level of pure threat, and removed it from the context of "harm[ing] women". You can't 'open the door' to an issue, and then try to close it when you're about to lose the point.

My comments were in the context of women being able to stop men.

Move along.

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 5:58 pm

Maddog wrote:But it's not like women don't point a gun at man every day in this country, and he learns some manners and starts behaving like an alter boy.

Here is the context.

by Original Quill Sat Mar 20, 2021 6:23 pm

Your comment was one sentence, and here it is:

Maddog wrote:The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time.

Clearly, you were alluding to a higher, more abstract generality. Now, you're ducking the point.

It's important because, now that you disavow the point, people must realize that the reasoning is flat-out bullshite. Its own advocate feels compelled to abandon it in the face of being called out.

by eddie Sat Mar 20, 2021 9:52 pm

Maddog wrote:
eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

But it's not like women don't point a gun at man every day in this country, and he learns some manners and starts behaving like an alter boy.

No idea what you’re talking about. Care to tell me in plain english?

The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time.

Nothing is guaranteed.

And I speak Texan, not English.

But your comment was about women getting men to behave, no?

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 10:16 pm

eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

The threat of being shot makes people behave better most of the time.

Nothing is guaranteed.

And I speak Texan, not English.

But your comment was about women getting men to behave, no?

Behave as in not fucking rape or attack them.

Is this really that difficult to understand?

by eddie Sat Mar 20, 2021 10:23 pm

You said this:

“But it's not like women don't point a gun at man every day in this country, and he learns some manners and starts behaving like an alter boy.”

What does that mean???

by Ben Reilly Sat Mar 20, 2021 10:52 pm

Maddog, some more explanation really would be more helpful. Do you mean, for example, that all across America every day, wives and girlfriends are using guns to threaten their husbands and boyfriends?

Or that every day across America, women are protecting themselves from would-be rapists by pulling out their guns?

by Maddog Sat Mar 20, 2021 10:59 pm

Ben Reilly wrote:Maddog, some more explanation really would be more helpful. Do you mean, for example, that all across America every day, wives and girlfriends are using guns to threaten their husbands and boyfriends?

Or that every day across America, women are protecting themselves from would-be rapists by pulling out their guns?

Sweet fucking Jesus.

Everyday in this country a woman brandishes, points or fires a weapon at a man committing a crime.

That act makes the male criminal stop what he's doing.

Is that clear enough?

by eddie Sat Mar 20, 2021 11:12 pm

Maddog wrote:
Ben Reilly wrote:Maddog, some more explanation really would be more helpful. Do you mean, for example, that all across America every day, wives and girlfriends are using guns to threaten their husbands and boyfriends?

Or that every day across America, women are protecting themselves from would-be rapists by pulling out their guns?

Sweet fucking Jesus.

Everyday in this country a woman brandishes, points or fires a weapon at a man committing a crime.

That act makes the male criminal stop what he's doing.

Is that clear enough?

Well it’s clearly not working as men are still committing violent crimes every day - like you just stated.
You just shat on your own logic dude.

by gelico Sun Mar 21, 2021 12:43 am

Syl wrote:This has been happening since time began.
Women are AFRAID of walking alone at night. I don't know of any woman who is not uncomfortable or wary of walking on their own in the dark if a man is walking behind her.

Sarah Everard was just walking home from a friends house around 9pm, and some monster ensured she never arrived.
Talking about this to a male friend he remarked..."why on earth was she walking through Clapham common at night".
That's exactly the point....WHY should a woman not feel safe to walk home in the dark, and what can men do to ensure women don't feel threatened by them?

this is the first post i've seen, and honestly, syl, i've never been afraid of walking about in the dark.

t'other night i was coming back from someone's house and chose to walk down an alley

half way down it 3 dudes turned in and were walking towards me. they simply moved to the side and let me pass.

at no time did i feel afraid, you know why?

most people are not going to attack you

would you cower indoors during a storm just in case you get hit by lightening?, i mean a lot of people do so it could happen to you too, right?

the chances of that happening are about as likely as getting attacked

by eddie Sun Mar 21, 2021 12:54 am

gelico wrote:
Syl wrote:This has been happening since time began.
Women are AFRAID of walking alone at night. I don't know of any woman who is not uncomfortable or wary of walking on their own in the dark if a man is walking behind her.

Sarah Everard was just walking home from a friends house around 9pm, and some monster ensured she never arrived.
Talking about this to a male friend he remarked..."why on earth was she walking through Clapham common at night".
That's exactly the point....WHY should a woman not feel safe to walk home in the dark, and what can men do to ensure women don't feel threatened by them?

this is the first post i've seen, and honestly, syl, i've never been afraid of walking about in the dark.

t'other night i was coming back from someone's house and chose to walk down an alley

half way down it 3 dudes turned in and were walking towards me. they simply moved to the side and let me pass.

at no time did i feel afraid, you know why?

most people are not going to attack you

would you cower indoors during a storm just in case you get hit by lightening?, i mean a lot of people do so it could happen to you too, right?

the chances of that happening are about as likely as getting attacked

Exactly what I have said! Thank god someone else understands what I’ve been trying to say.

by Syl Sun Mar 21, 2021 1:04 am

I'm glad you two are OK with walking alone at night, obviously it doesn't affect all women.

Gels, it would be interesting to know if you have had any dubious encounters with strangers in the past.
I have and I think the majority of women, sometime in their lives have.

by eddie Sun Mar 21, 2021 1:09 am

Syl wrote:I'm glad you two are OK with walking alone at night, obviously it doesn't affect all women.

Gels, it would be interesting to know if you have had any dubious encounters with strangers in the past.
I have and I think the majority of women, sometime in their lives have.

We probably all have Syl. I know I have but it didn’t affect me as deeply as you obviously - and I’m not saying you’re “wrong” to feel like that, please don’t get me wrong.

It’s just....fear is not always healthy or even justified. It can grow, if we let it, or it can be conquered.

by Syl Sun Mar 21, 2021 12:30 pm

eddie wrote:
Syl wrote:I'm glad you two are OK with walking alone at night, obviously it doesn't affect all women.

Gels, it would be interesting to know if you have had any dubious encounters with strangers in the past.
I have and I think the majority of women, sometime in their lives have.

We probably all have Syl. I know I have but it didn’t affect me as deeply as you obviously - and I’m not saying you’re “wrong” to feel like that, please don’t get me wrong.

It’s just....fear is not always healthy or even justified. It can grow, if we let it, or it can be conquered.

I have to be honest Eddie, when I was out and about on my own at night I was never unduly worried, though there have been times when I felt decidedly unnerved if someone was walking behind me down an isolated road at night.
Nowadays I don't have to walk out at night on my own, I either get a lift or a cab if I am on my own.

The outpouring of grief and anger by many thousands of women since Sarah Everard was attacked and murdered whilst walking home, does show that this is a huge problem in this country.

I do think it will be addressed more in the future...and from what I have heard, it does seem to be younger women who feel more strongly about this now than maybe my, or even your generation.

by Syl Sun Mar 21, 2021 1:11 pm

eddie wrote:
Syl wrote:I'm glad you two are OK with walking alone at night, obviously it doesn't affect all women.

Gels, it would be interesting to know if you have had any dubious encounters with strangers in the past.
I have and I think the majority of women, sometime in their lives have.

We probably all have Syl. I know I have but it didn’t affect me as deeply as you obviously - and I’m not saying you’re “wrong” to feel like that, please don’t get me wrong.

It’s just....fear is not always healthy or even justified. It can grow, if we let it, or it can be conquered.

I have had a think about this one, I know of loads of women who have experienced unpleasant sexual encounters at the hands of strangers.

One friend was robbed and raped, others have been grabbed, flashed at, being called derogatory sexual names whilst minding their own business is common place.
Myself....flashed at, masturbated at, demeaning encounter with a male street artist, had the word MELONS repeatedly shouted after me whilst walking through a street market (OK, that one was pretty funny)
One I just remembered, many years ago, walking through town at night and some little twerp walked towards me and punched me hard on the shoulder...I dropped my bag and everything fell out onto the pavement, twerp ran off.
I have to say that annoyed me far more than it scared me. But the worst things about that was people standing in a taxi queue over the road did or said absolutely nothing to help.
Once got in a taxi, (the back seat) After we had set off I noticed a used condom hanging from the grip handle on the opposite door, I told the driver, asked if he could stop and remove it, he just shrugged, pretended he didn't understand what I was saying, and kept driving.....I didn't tip. snobby

by JulesV Sun Mar 21, 2021 1:41 pm

I noticed a rather spooky coincidence when we reached the first anniversary of the original lockdown, in the UK. Shocked

April 2020 was near the start of the first lockdown. American Cop Derek Chauvin committed murder (allegedly) not long after.

April 2021 will be near the end of a whole year of this pandemic nightmare. Kent Cop Wayne Couzens committed murder (allegedly) as we approach the end of this current lockdown, a year later.

It's like these two similar events, both massive, punctuate both ends of the calendar year in question.

I know that neither cop has been convicted yet and - and the protests were not on the same scale but it's an eerie coincidence that these two 'cop murder' crimes occurred at opposite ends of the pandemic nightmare year!

by Maddog Sun Mar 21, 2021 2:12 pm

eddie wrote:
Maddog wrote:

Sweet fucking Jesus.

Everyday in this country a woman brandishes, points or fires a weapon at a man committing a crime.

That act makes the male criminal stop what he's doing.

Is that clear enough?

Well it’s clearly not working as men are still committing violent crimes every day - like you just stated.
You just shat on your own logic dude.

No, nothing works all the time. Locking your doors won't keep people out of your car either. I guess I'll start leaving my truck unlocked too. Rolling Eyes

by HoratioTarr Sun Mar 21, 2021 3:49 pm

Syl wrote:
eddie wrote:

We probably all have Syl. I know I have but it didn’t affect me as deeply as you obviously - and I’m not saying you’re “wrong” to feel like that, please don’t get me wrong.

It’s just....fear is not always healthy or even justified. It can grow, if we let it, or it can be conquered.

I have had a think about this one, I know of loads of women who have experienced unpleasant sexual encounters at the hands of strangers.

One friend was robbed and raped, others have been grabbed, flashed at, being called derogatory sexual names whilst minding their own business is common place.
Myself....flashed at, masturbated at, demeaning encounter with a male street artist, had the word MELONS repeatedly shouted after me whilst walking through a street market (OK, that one was pretty funny)
One I just remembered, many years ago, walking through town at night and some little twerp walked towards me and punched me hard on the shoulder...I dropped my bag and everything fell out onto the pavement, twerp ran off.
I have to say that annoyed me far more than it scared me. But the worst things about that was people standing in a taxi queue over the road did or said absolutely nothing to help.
Once got in a taxi, (the back seat) After we had set off I noticed a used condom hanging from the grip handle on the opposite door, I told the driver, asked if he could stop and remove it, he just shrugged, pretended he didn't understand what I was saying, and kept driving.....I didn't tip.

Most women have tales like this. One that stands out as particularly horrible for me was when I was around 13. I took my little brother to the cinema. It was a matinee and the place was only about three quarters full. As the lights went down, this middle aged creep came and sat right next to me, then just stared at me for the next 45 minutes. My brother, who was only four, was obviously oblivious. I felt so uncomfortable I didn't know what to do, so I just ignored him. When the lights when up at the intermission I dragged me and bro off to the toilets, waited til the lights went down then crept back to different seats. Then I saw this guy cruising up and down the aisles looking for me. I just sank right down in my seat and luckily, he missed me. It wasn't a time kids were aware of paedo's, at least not like now. If I caught someone doing that to a young girl now, they'd wish they'd never been born!

by HoratioTarr Sun Mar 21, 2021 4:09 pm

The time I suffered an outrageous attack of sexual abuse was when I was working as a dancer. I had to get changed in the lady's toilets upstairs at this restaurant. Next thing I knew this guy barged into the ladies and banged on the toilet cubicle where I was changing and yelled, "I want to see your tits...Oh, go on, show us your tits...just one look". The fact that his wife was downstairs at the bar, didn't deter him.

In the end I had to kick the cubicle door onto his hands and tell him to Fuck off. Being professional, I didn't make a fuss, danced, got my money and left. Down at the bar next to his wife he wouldn't even look at me. What a fucking creep. Had he pushed his luck too far, trust me, he'd have had no teeth. After his fingers got mashed in the door, he backed off. Needless to say I refused to dance there again. I had loads of incidences like this. And some very very funny ones too. You had to be tough skinned to deal with it though.

by Syl Sun Mar 21, 2021 4:22 pm

HoratioTarr wrote:
Syl wrote:

I have had a think about this one, I know of loads of women who have experienced unpleasant sexual encounters at the hands of strangers.

One friend was robbed and raped, others have been grabbed, flashed at, being called derogatory sexual names whilst minding their own business is common place.
Myself....flashed at, masturbated at, demeaning encounter with a male street artist, had the word MELONS repeatedly shouted after me whilst walking through a street market (OK, that one was pretty funny)
One I just remembered, many years ago, walking through town at night and some little twerp walked towards me and punched me hard on the shoulder...I dropped my bag and everything fell out onto the pavement, twerp ran off.
I have to say that annoyed me far more than it scared me. But the worst things about that was people standing in a taxi queue over the road did or said absolutely nothing to help.
Once got in a taxi, (the back seat) After we had set off I noticed a used condom hanging from the grip handle on the opposite door, I told the driver, asked if he could stop and remove it, he just shrugged, pretended he didn't understand what I was saying, and kept driving.....I didn't tip.

Most women have tales like this. One that stands out as particularly horrible for me was when I was around 13. I took my little brother to the cinema. It was a matinee and the place was only about three quarters full. As the lights went down, this middle aged creep came and sat right next to me, then just stared at me for the next 45 minutes. My brother, who was only four, was obviously oblivious. I felt so uncomfortable I didn't know what to do, so I just ignored him. When the lights when up at the intermission I dragged me and bro off to the toilets, waited til the lights went down then crept back to different seats. Then I saw this guy cruising up and down the aisles looking for me. I just sank right down in my seat and luckily, he missed me. It wasn't a time kids were aware of paedo's, at least not like now. If I caught someone doing that to a young girl now, they'd wish they'd never been born!

That must have been really scary when you were a child, especially when you were looking after your little brother.

Cinemas have always attracted perverts. When I was a teenager I used to work at the Odeon cinema in Oxford street. When we had a break, sometimes we would sit in the cinema and watch whatever film was showing.
The manager was an older family man, he was always on the lookout for lone males who would come and sit in the same row, even though the cinema was usually almost empty in the afternoons. As soon as they attempted to change seats and sit nearer me or one of the other girls he would turf them out.
We called them the 'dirty mac brigade'...and more often than not they did actually wear a mac. Rolling Eyes

by Syl Sun Mar 21, 2021 4:28 pm

HoratioTarr wrote:The time I suffered an outrageous attack of sexual abuse was when I was working as a dancer. I had to get changed in the lady's toilets upstairs at this restaurant. Next thing I knew this guy barged into the ladies and banged on the toilet cubicle where I was changing and yelled, "I want to see your tits...Oh, go on, show us your tits...just one look". The fact that his wife was downstairs at the bar, didn't deter him.

In the end I had to kick the cubicle door onto his hands and tell him to Fuck off. Being professional, I didn't make a fuss, danced, got my money and left. Down at the bar next to his wife he wouldn't even look at me. What a fucking creep. Had he pushed his luck too far, trust me, he'd have had no teeth. After his fingers got mashed in the door, he backed off. Needless to say I refused to dance there again. I had loads of incidences like this. And some very very funny ones too. You had to be tough skinned to deal with it though.

The problem with some men (a minority hopefully) is because you worked as a dancer they would think you were easy game.
When I worked in clubs some men, like the creep that you encountered, would try it on even though they were with their wives or girlfriends The odd one even came into a club with their partner, then took her home and came back later alone to try their luck.

Like we have said, I'm sure every woman who has ever left the house has encountered creeps like this...sometimes funny, sometimes frightening, but always unwanted.

by Original Quill Sun Mar 21, 2021 4:57 pm

Syl wrote:
HoratioTarr wrote:The time I suffered an outrageous attack of sexual abuse was when I was working as a dancer. I had to get changed in the lady's toilets upstairs at this restaurant. Next thing I knew this guy barged into the ladies and banged on the toilet cubicle where I was changing and yelled, "I want to see your tits...Oh, go on, show us your tits...just one look". The fact that his wife was downstairs at the bar, didn't deter him.

In the end I had to kick the cubicle door onto his hands and tell him to Fuck off. Being professional, I didn't make a fuss, danced, got my money and left. Down at the bar next to his wife he wouldn't even look at me. What a fucking creep. Had he pushed his luck too far, trust me, he'd have had no teeth. After his fingers got mashed in the door, he backed off. Needless to say I refused to dance there again. I had loads of incidences like this. And some very very funny ones too. You had to be tough skinned to deal with it though.

The problem with some men (a minority hopefully) is because you worked as a dancer they would think you were easy game.
When I worked in clubs some men, like the creep that you encountered, would try it on even though they were with their wives or girlfriends The odd one even came into a club with their partner, then took her home and came back later alone to try their luck.

Like we have said, I'm sure every woman who has ever left the house has encountered creeps like this...sometimes funny, sometimes frightening, but always unwanted.

Most of the 'titty-bars' over here (sometimes they call them "gentlemen clubs") have 6' 9" security dudes, who make short-work of such assholes.

And I don't get the obsession with mammary glands, anyway. They serve no purpose that any guy would be interested in. Go to a farm and ogle the cows, fcs.

Just my opinion.

by Syl Sun Mar 21, 2021 5:12 pm

Original Quill wrote:
Syl wrote:

The problem with some men (a minority hopefully) is because you worked as a dancer they would think you were easy game.
When I worked in clubs some men, like the creep that you encountered, would try it on even though they were with their wives or girlfriends The odd one even came into a club with their partner, then took her home and came back later alone to try their luck.

Like we have said, I'm sure every woman who has ever left the house has encountered creeps like this...sometimes funny, sometimes frightening, but always unwanted.

Most of the 'titty-bars' over here (sometimes they call them "gentlemen clubs") have 6' 9" security dudes, who make short-work of such assholes.

And I don't get the obsession with mammary glands, anyway. They serve no purpose that any guy would be interested in. Go to a farm and ogle the cows, fcs.

Just my opinion.

I suspect not a very popular one. Laughing

by Original Quill Sun Mar 21, 2021 7:12 pm

Syl wrote:
Original Quill wrote:

Most of the 'titty-bars' over here (sometimes they call them "gentlemen clubs") have 6' 9" security dudes, who make short-work of such assholes.

And I don't get the obsession with mammary glands, anyway. They serve no purpose that any guy would be interested in. Go to a farm and ogle the cows, fcs.

Just my opinion.

I suspect not a very popular one.

Actually, few men that I have asked that question of, have an answer. They either agree with me, or simply say they don't know. Maybe it's an instinct, born of fond memories of/with their mothers.

I mean, objectively, I'm right. You can't actually do anything with mammary glands, can you? Why are women still afraid to walk home at night? - Page 5 2190311264

Why are women still afraid to walk home at night? - Page 5 2190311264

At least, not productively. Evil or Very Mad

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