missing girl special needs

First topic message reminder :

The girl missing from her hotel in Malaya has been found dead in Jungle. Report said she was naked when found. Why the fuck did they have to say that,it's bad enough she's dead without that , her poor Parents .

Raggamuffin wrote:

eddie wrote:

Erm no, I I have never minded people taking me to task. I wasn’t the one who got angry and waffly and changing my stance, was I?  Why would I care if people didn’t like my humour, Rags? That’s a weird thing to think. I rarely, if ever, get angry if people don’t agree with me. I rarely if ever, get offended by people calling me names. I rarely, if ever, have a need to be agreed with.  
I think you’re angry because something made you angry, it wasn’t really my joke was it?

Where did I get angry or defensive? I asked each of you questions. They may have made some people uncomfortable, perhaps.  

Oh you did get defensive. You insisted that people had misunderstood your "joke", even when it was clear they hadn't. You've persisted in your own defence over and over again. Ben has waded in and tried to distract people by making an even worse remark.

Now you're trying to make out that you're fit to judge other people's reactions. I already said what's bothering me, and now you can add to those reasons another one - your utter conviction that you're here to make people question themselves.

Raggs, what you are doing is called 'obsessive-compulsive disorder.' Move on.

Original Quill wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Oh you did get defensive. You insisted that people had misunderstood your "joke", even when it was clear they hadn't. You've persisted in your own defence over and over again. Ben has waded in and tried to distract people by making an even worse remark.

Now you're trying to make out that you're fit to judge other people's reactions. I already said what's bothering me, and now you can add to those reasons another one - your utter conviction that you're here to make people question themselves.

Raggs, what you are doing is called 'obsessive-compulsive disorder.'  Move on.

Nope. I'm not the one who set a trap and treated people like they don't know themselves. That was eddie and Ben. Until they can explain their need to do that, I'll carry on.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Original Quill wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Oh you did get defensive. You insisted that people had misunderstood your "joke", even when it was clear they hadn't. You've persisted in your own defence over and over again. Ben has waded in and tried to distract people by making an even worse remark.

Now you're trying to make out that you're fit to judge other people's reactions. I already said what's bothering me, and now you can add to those reasons another one - your utter conviction that you're here to make people question themselves.

Raggs, what you are doing is called 'obsessive-compulsive disorder.'  Move on.

Nope. I'm not the one who set a trap and treated people like they don't know themselves. That was eddie and Ben. Until they can explain their need to do that, I'll carry on.

This whole thing's devolved into circular logic and turned into a circle-jerk, so I'm ducking out of it for the moment. I've gone to get some cigarettes, I'll be right back!

Defensive? I don’t think anyone misunderstood my joke Rags. I knew people got it - I made it clear I wasn’t laughing at her death, that was all.

Where did I make out I was fit to judge other’s reactions? By giving my opinion?

In that case, you deem yourself fit to judge me, right?

Seriously, how long do you wish to harp on about this? Is this your new target so you can relieve yourself of some anger? It’s a little disproportionate, don’t you think?

eddie wrote:Defensive? I don’t think anyone misunderstood my joke Rags. I knew people got it - I made it clear I wasn’t laughing at her death, that was all.

Where did I make out I was fit to judge other’s reactions? By giving my opinion?

In that case, you deem yourself fit to judge me, right?

Seriously, how long do you wish to harp on about this? Is this your new target so you can relieve yourself of some anger? It’s a little disproportionate, don’t you think?

People already knew it wasn't about the girl's death, but you laboured the point as if the "joke" was fine as long as it wasn't about her death. You did use her death to make a horrible comment though.

No, it's not disproportionate. You and Ben have blamed others for not liking your comment - let's stop calling it a joke shall we? Ben has gone further and accused others of being fake.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Original Quill wrote:

Raggs, what you are doing is called 'obsessive-compulsive disorder.'  Move on.

Nope. I'm not the one who set a trap and treated people like they don't know themselves. That was eddie and Ben. Until they can explain their need to do that, I'll carry on.

a trap?

well, if they both said what they said deliberately to get a reaction then what difference does it make anyway.?

what was said was still said and peoples reactions to it were peoples reactions to it regardless of why
can i ask you again though

do you consider yourself a better person because you didn't say such things?

Eddie and I saw all the waffling and I'll admit, we both smelled blood.

So you decided to go for it, and now you don't like it that I'm persisting.

As for the "waffle", that was people giving their opinions.

Raggamuffin wrote:

eddie wrote:Defensive? I don’t think anyone misunderstood my joke Rags. I knew people got it - I made it clear I wasn’t laughing at her death, that was all.

Where did I make out I was fit to judge other’s reactions? By giving my opinion?

In that case, you deem yourself fit to judge me, right?

Seriously, how long do you wish to harp on about this? Is this your new target so you can relieve yourself of some anger? It’s a little disproportionate, don’t you think?

People already knew it wasn't about the girl's death, but you laboured the point as if the "joke" was fine as long as it wasn't about her death. You did use her death to make a horrible comment though.

No, it's not disproportionate. You and Ben have blamed others for not liking your comment - let's stop calling it a joke shall we? Ben has gone further and accused others of being fake.

Okay, so you admit you know the joke wasn't about the girl dying. So what actually did make it "not fine"?

That's the question we've been trying to get a lucid answer to.

Is it not okay to joke about dead people? About girls? About people with her disability? What is it, and why?

Ben Reilly wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:


People already knew it wasn't about the girl's death, but you laboured the point as if the "joke" was fine as long as it wasn't about her death. You did use her death to make a horrible comment though.

No, it's not disproportionate. You and Ben have blamed others for not liking your comment - let's stop calling it a joke shall we? Ben has gone further and accused others of being fake.

Okay, so you admit you know the joke wasn't about the girl dying. So what actually did make it "not fine"?

That's the question we've been trying to get a lucid answer to.

Is it not okay to joke about dead people? About girls? About people with her disability? What is it, and why?

I said ages ago that I knew it wasn't about Nora dying.

"We"? So you and eddie are speaking as one now?

It's not OK to make a cruel comment which is basically aimed at her parents - I said that already.

No, I was using the royal "we," actually.

So you actually think that within the joke about her name being stupid was a serious criticism of the parents, blaming them for her death?

What's really going on here?

Ben Reilly wrote:No, I was using the royal "we," actually.

So you actually think that within the joke about her name being stupid was a serious criticism of the parents, blaming them for her death?

What's really going on here?

I didn't say that. Eddie made a nasty remark about Nora's name and actually "joked" that she killed herself because of it. Who do you think named her?

Raggamuffin wrote:

Ben Reilly wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:


People already knew it wasn't about the girl's death, but you laboured the point as if the "joke" was fine as long as it wasn't about her death. You did use her death to make a horrible comment though.

No, it's not disproportionate. You and Ben have blamed others for not liking your comment - let's stop calling it a joke shall we? Ben has gone further and accused others of being fake.

Okay, so you admit you know the joke wasn't about the girl dying. So what actually did make it "not fine"?

That's the question we've been trying to get a lucid answer to.

Is it not okay to joke about dead people? About girls? About people with her disability? What is it, and why?

I said ages ago that I knew it wasn't about Nora dying.

"We"? So you and eddie are speaking as one now?

It's not OK to make a cruel comment which is basically aimed at her parents - I said that already.

I see, so you’re angry and offended on her parent’s behalf.

What if she’d not died? Would you still have the same anger on her parent’s behalf?

Are people not allowed to comment on someone’s name in case you’re offended on the behalf of the people who named her?

eddie wrote:I see, so you’re angry and offended on her parent’s behalf.

What if she’d not died? Would you still have the same anger on her parent’s behalf?

Are people not allowed to comment on someone’s name in case you’re offended on the behalf of the people who named her?

Yes to the first two questions.

You didn't just comment on her name did you?

Raggamuffin wrote:

eddie wrote:I see, so you’re angry and offended on her parent’s behalf.

What if she’d not died? Would you still have the same anger on her parent’s behalf?

Are people not allowed to comment on someone’s name in case you’re offended on the behalf of the people who named her?

Yes to the first two questions.

You didn't just comment on her name did you?

Can you answer the last question?

Here it is again:

Are people not allowed to comment on someone’s name in case you’re offended on the behalf of the people who named her?

Raggamuffin wrote:

Ben Reilly wrote:No, I was using the royal "we," actually.

So you actually think that within the joke about her name being stupid was a serious criticism of the parents, blaming them for her death?

What's really going on here?

I didn't say that. Eddie made a nasty remark about Nora's name and actually "joked" that she killed herself because of it. Who do you think named her?

You keep putting joked in quotes, as though you don't agree that it was a joke. If you think she was being serious, we need to have that discussion and establish whether it was a joke first -- then discuss whether and why the joke was offensive.

eddie wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Yes to the first two questions.

You didn't just comment on her name did you?

Can you answer the last question?

Here it is again:

Are people not allowed to comment on someone’s name in case you’re offended on the behalf of the people who named her?

You're asking an irrelevant question because that's not what you did. You actually said she probably killed herself because of her name.

Ben Reilly wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

I didn't say that. Eddie made a nasty remark about Nora's name and actually "joked" that she killed herself because of it. Who do you think named her?

You keep putting joked in quotes, as though you don't agree that it was a joke. If you think she was being serious, we need to have that discussion and establish whether it was a joke first -- then discuss whether and why the joke was offensive.

Well a joke is supposed to be funny, and the only other person who thought it was funny was gelico - who by her own admission doesn't really have any boundaries.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Ben Reilly wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

I didn't say that. Eddie made a nasty remark about Nora's name and actually "joked" that she killed herself because of it. Who do you think named her?

You keep putting joked in quotes, as though you don't agree that it was a joke. If you think she was being serious, we need to have that discussion and establish whether it was a joke first -- then discuss whether and why the joke was offensive.

Well a joke is supposed to be funny, and the only other person who thought it was funny was gelico - who by her own admission doesn't really have any boundaries.

Not all jokes appeal to all people...how many people have to be amused to make it a joke? Are you the judge of whether a joke is funny, Rags?
You’re making no sense.

I’m bored.

Raggamuffin wrote:Eddie, would you have made that joke directly to Nora's parents?

Are you going to answer this eddie?

Raggamuffin wrote:

*If someone tells me of someone who died in some hilarious way, but they are deadly serious and sad, I'm not going to laugh in their face or joke on the matter, despite thinking it.

I’d probably laugh then say “Sorry, not laughing at your loss but you gotta admit that’s funny”.

Really? You would expect them to laugh?  

How about this question?

eddie wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Well a joke is supposed to be funny, and the only other person who thought it was funny was gelico - who by her own admission doesn't really have any boundaries.

Not all jokes appeal to all people...how many people have to be amused to make it a joke? Are you the judge of whether a joke is funny, Rags?
You’re making no sense.

I’m bored.  

You're bored? You "smelt blood" and now you're bored. Oh well ...

Raggamuffin wrote:

eddie wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Well a joke is supposed to be funny, and the only other person who thought it was funny was gelico - who by her own admission doesn't really have any boundaries.

Not all jokes appeal to all people...how many people have to be amused to make it a joke? Are you the judge of whether a joke is funny, Rags?
You’re making no sense.

I’m bored.  

You're bored? You "smelt blood" and now you're bored. Oh well ...

Just looking for someone to spell out what exactly was offensive about the joke.

Waffle is boring. "I don't know why I feel that way" is far more interesting, not to mention honest.

Unless you really care so much about Maebh and Sebastian Quoirin that your heart bleeds at the thought that they might come across eddie's joke about Nora killing herself over the name they gave her and be thick enough to actually blame themselves for their daughter's death.

Is that why you're so upset?

Come on, would you both make your "jokes" to their face? Would you expect them to laugh?

Raggamuffin wrote:Come on, would you both make your "jokes" to their face? Would you expect them to laugh?

The jokes weren't made to their face, so what does it matter?

Ben Reilly wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:Come on, would you both make your "jokes" to their face? Would you expect them to laugh?

The jokes weren't made to their face, so what does it matter?

Oh I see. So you wouldn't say it directly to them then? Is that because you think they might be upset? Suddenly, your "jokes" aren't so funny?

anyway talking of parents naming their kids

when my eldest boy went to secondary school he was sent to one i really didn't like (i missed the deadline for the one i wanted).

anyhoos about a week into him being there he got jumped by 4-5 others in the changing rooms who gave him a right fucking battering, ripped up his clothes and all. the PE teacher found him and asked him if he was ok and then sent him home

i was doing my gaga over it and said told him you're not going back there until this is sorted.

i rang and rang and rang and left message after message for someone to contact me but they didn't then i started to get voice messages stating ''you're son is absent from school, please call''. i was trying to get someone to talk to about the situation but no bastard would call.

after about a week of being really frustrated i went to the school office and explained the situation and told the woman there i had been ringing all last week to talk to someone. she was a total jobsworth and just kept parroting that i had to send my son in and i kept telling her i wasnt going to until the issue was resolved.

the convo went nowhere, eventually i said, well perhaps you could pass on my intention to keep my son at home and if anyone has the decency to call me that would be great. by the way can i take your name?

she looked my up and down and just said ''my name is irrelevant''

too good to miss i just looked her up and down right back and put on my most sympathetic face and just said ''damn, i'm so sorry. no wonder you look so miserable. what a terrible name to have given you. so your parents clearly didn't give shit about you from day 1 then. you poor thing,,,,,,still tbh i think they named you well. it does actually suit you''

in with that i walked out

and you know what the school was calling me within half a fucking hour

nothing about my son just because i had ''abused'' a member of staff

i told 'em to fuck right off

i got him into the one i initially wanted after a few weeks

Ben Reilly wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

You're bored? You "smelt blood" and now you're bored. Oh well ...

Just looking for someone to spell out what exactly was offensive about the joke.

Waffle is boring. "I don't know why I feel that way" is far more interesting, not to mention honest.

Unless you really care so much about Maebh and Sebastian Quoirin that your heart bleeds at the thought that they might come across eddie's joke about Nora killing herself over the name they gave her and be thick enough to actually blame themselves for their daughter's death.

Is that why you're so upset?

I told you what bothered me, and now you're accusing me of not being honest. Do you always call people liars if they don't give the answer you want?

Not just liars, and I don't want to flog a dead horse here, but everyone who expressed honest dislike of the joke was labelled as...

Fake
Dishonest
Parrotting
Nampy Pampy
Being clenched
Moral posturing
and having no sense of humour.

Pretty strong labels for people expressing their honest opinion (of course if you work on the assumption everyone else is mostly fake, then this is less surprising).

gelico wrote:
anyway talking of parents naming their kids

when my eldest boy went to secondary school he was sent to one i really didn't like (i missed the deadline for the one i wanted).

anyhoos about a week into him being there he got jumped by 4-5 others in the changing rooms who gave him a right fucking battering, ripped up his clothes and all.  the PE teacher found him and asked him if he was ok and then sent him home

i was doing my gaga over it and said told him you're not going back there until this is sorted.

i rang and rang and rang and left message after message for someone to contact me but they didn't then i started to get voice messages stating ''you're son is absent from school, please call''.  i was trying to get someone to talk to about the situation but no bastard would call.

after about a week of being really frustrated i went to the school office and explained the situation and told the woman there i had been ringing all last week to talk to someone.  she was a total jobsworth and just kept parroting that i had to send my son in and i kept telling her i wasnt going to until the issue was resolved.

the convo went nowhere, eventually i said, well perhaps you could pass on my intention to keep my son at home and if anyone has the decency to call me that would be great.  by the way can i take your name?

she looked my up and down and just said ''my name is irrelevant''

too good to miss i just looked her up and down right back and put on my most sympathetic face and just said ''damn, i'm so sorry.  no wonder you  look so miserable.  what a terrible name to have given you.  so your parents clearly didn't give shit about you from day 1 then.  you poor thing,,,,,,still tbh i think they named you well.  it does actually suit you''

in with that i walked out

and you know what the school was calling me within half a fucking hour

nothing about my son just because i had ''abused'' a member of staff

i told 'em to fuck right off

i got him into the one i initially wanted after a few weeks

+1

Eilzel wrote:Not just liars, and I don't want to flog a dead horse here, but everyone who expressed honest dislike of the joke was labelled as...

Fake
Dishonest
Parrotting
Nampy Pampy
Being clenched
Moral posturing
and having no sense of humour.

Pretty strong labels for people expressing their honest opinion (of course if you work on the assumption everyone else is mostly fake, then this is less surprising).

Ok, we know which side you are on, Les. We don't need any proselytizing. Is there any more substantive points to be made?

No?

Well then, let's move on.

Original Quill wrote:

Eilzel wrote:Not just liars, and I don't want to flog a dead horse here, but everyone who expressed honest dislike of the joke was labelled as...

Fake
Dishonest
Parrotting
Nampy Pampy
Being clenched
Moral posturing
and having no sense of humour.

Pretty strong labels for people expressing their honest opinion (of course if you work on the assumption everyone else is mostly fake, then this is less surprising).

Ok, we know which side you are on, Les.  We don't need any proselytizing.  Is there any more substantive points to be made?

No?

Well then, let's move on.  

I think people can decide for themselves when enough has been said, but thanks for your input

Eilzel wrote:

Original Quill wrote:

Ok, we know which side you are on, Les.  We don't need any proselytizing.  Is there any more substantive points to be made?

No?

Well then, let's move on.  

I think people can decide for themselves when enough has been said, but thanks for your input

I'm not the talker, I'm the listener. I have heard enough.

Original Quill wrote:

Eilzel wrote:

Original Quill wrote:

Ok, we know which side you are on, Les.  We don't need any proselytizing.  Is there any more substantive points to be made?

No?

Well then, let's move on.  

I think people can decide for themselves when enough has been said, but thanks for your input

I'm not the talker, I'm the listener.  I have heard enough.

Don't click the thread then

But when y'all are picking on people, it's hard not to. It's really time to give it up. No more point(s) to be made. Just face slaps...

Original Quill wrote:But when y'all are picking on people, it's hard not to.  It's really time to give it up.  No more point(s) to be made.  Just face slaps...

No one is picking on anyone.

Great...let's put it behind us.

Didge, have you followed the thread? I wondered when you might come and say what you think. I don’t mind if you lambast me, I just know that you may be honest.

Quill, I thank you for trying to get the Thread of Mayhem back on topic, but may I ask, and please don’t waffle...why are you taking the stance you’re taking? It’s actually caught my interest and that doesn’t happen often with many people.

Original Quill wrote:

Eilzel wrote:

Original Quill wrote:

Ok, we know which side you are on, Les.  We don't need any proselytizing.  Is there any more substantive points to be made?

No?

Well then, let's move on.  

I think people can decide for themselves when enough has been said, but thanks for your input

I'm not the talker, I'm the listener.  I have heard enough.

Sometimes though, you’re not always a good listener when it comes to reading articles properly. And I say that precisely so that everyone reads this and realises something:

You have been seemingly taking “my side” yet here I am, taking you up on something rather than being all “huggy wuggy” with you!

But sometimes, and especially when you open up, you really do seem to listen. And that makes me always give you a chance. Because you irritate the shit out of me, we argue a lot you and I, but every now and then...I wonder why you often make me surprised. And I like that.  Makes me realise that I always have something to learn about someone, when I thought I had them all figured out.  
And I’ll always admit it too. I wait for people to do that. That’s why I ask questions. I want to be made to think and be surprised. I hate bullshit.

So thank you. Not for taking my side - perhaps you thought the joke “unfit” - I don’t care really, but thank you for speaking up and actually making me rethink my own views on someone I actually wrote off a lot.  

There’s some kind of compliment there.  I’m not into platitudes but I hope you got my gist.

Oh and Quill? Don’t reply with anything but a proper response to what I’ve actually said.
Quotes and historical articles don’t interest me.  I like raw honesty. Otherwise I’m a little bored if I’m honest.

Anyway, I’ve waffled like the Queen of Waffle.  Not sure anyone takes me that seriously anyway.  
But I’m pretty okay with that.  

Didge, thank you for your PM. You can say anything you like anywhere, anytime.
Appreciate it.

Eilzel wrote:Not just liars, and I don't want to flog a dead horse here, but everyone who expressed honest dislike of the joke was labelled as...

Fake
Dishonest
Parrotting
Nampy Pampy
Being clenched
Moral posturing
and having no sense of humour.

Pretty strong labels for people expressing their honest opinion (of course if you work on the assumption everyone else is mostly fake, then this is less surprising).

Exactly, and there's been no response to that.

There's been no response to my questions either.

eddie wrote:Didge, thank you for your PM. You can say anything you like anywhere, anytime.
Appreciate it.  

Eddie as i explain in my PM. I have not seen many comedians make direct dark humour at the death of a specific child
Yes comedians make dead baby jokes, but they are never directed at any individual as you did here.
Hence it was really in pooor taste. You may not agree, but clearly many people feel this is the case.

Ben did the same to me once making light of the holocaust, claiming to place me in an oven. He saw how poor that was. 
He is not Jewish and Jewish comedians are about the only people who can get away with such jokes

The point is your joke crossed a line, as it was targeted specifically at this individual

eddie wrote:


But sometimes, and especially when you open up, you really do seem to listen. And that makes me always give you a chance. Because you irritate the shit out of me, we argue a lot you and I, but every now and then...I wonder why you often make me surprised. And I like that.  Makes me realise that I always have something to learn about someone, when I thought I had them all figured out.  
And I’ll always admit it too. I wait for people to do that. That’s why I ask questions. I want to be made to think and be surprised. I hate bullshit.

Post snipped.

Are you sure that's why you ask questions - because you want to be made to think? It seems to me that you do it because you want other people to think. Perhaps if you answered some questions, you might be made to think. You've ignored most of my questions, and you've ignored Les's post twice.[/quote]

Raggamuffin wrote:

Eilzel wrote:Not just liars, and I don't want to flog a dead horse here, but everyone who expressed honest dislike of the joke was labelled as...

Fake
Dishonest
Parrotting
Nampy Pampy
Being clenched
Moral posturing
and having no sense of humour.

Pretty strong labels for people expressing their honest opinion (of course if you work on the assumption everyone else is mostly fake, then this is less surprising).

Exactly, and there's been no response to that.

There's been no response to my questions either.

you never responded to mine either

i've asked you 3 times if you consider yourself a better person than ben or eddie based on the fact that you didn't/wouldn't make such remarks......you never answered.

phildidge wrote:

eddie wrote:Didge, thank you for your PM. You can say anything you like anywhere, anytime.
Appreciate it.  

Eddie as i explain in my PM. I have not seen many comedians make direct dark humour at the death of a specific child
Yes comedians make dead baby jokes, but they are never directed at any individual as you did here.
Hence it was really in pooor taste. You may not agree, but clearly many people feel this is the case.

Ben did the same to me once making light of the holocaust, claiming to place me in an oven. He saw how poor that was. 
He is not Jewish and Jewish comedians are about the only people who can get away with such jokes

The point is your joke crossed a line, as it was targeted specifically at this individual

thanks for the green didge, nice to see you here again. seems a while since we spoke

@ everyone,,,,,,,,here's the thing though

i showed my daughter the comments and her immediate reaction was ''omg i can hear daddy saying that to Rob'' (one of hubbys friends). they were terrible together. rob had 4 girls and when they were young and hubby went over to his house. when he was leaving he would joke and pretend to go up the stairs undoing his trousers saying ''just gonna say goodnight to your girls, rob''.

i've been surrounded by dark humour for years.

in the care home death, disease, dementia, depression, i can tell you dark jokes were very much commonplace

my brother still works in intensive care and has probably seen countless people die. again dark jokes fly back and forth especially if one of them qualifies for a darwin award....there can be much hiliarity and someone just died.

of course these comments aren't made to the relatives, but they are still said so when i saw the comments it didn't faze me at all.

HOWEVER, for those who don't have my dysfunctional family life where everyone gets completely roasted, i can understand how others would be shocked/disappointed/disgusted etc.

people have every right to think and feel and say what they like in reaction to the comments

but i will just say again

y'all have known eddie and ben for best part of 10 years or more. you all know they are fun loving caring people. are you all prepared to judge so harshly based on a couple of comments that were inappropriate and crass?

gelico wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Exactly, and there's been no response to that.

There's been no response to my questions either.

you never responded to mine either

i've asked you 3 times if you consider yourself a better person than ben or eddie based on the fact that you didn't/wouldn't make such remarks......you never answered.

I did answer, just not in the way that you liked. It was a trick question, and it was irrelevant. I do find you a bit aggressive, especially after that story where you abused a school employee and dragged her parents into it.

gelico wrote:

phildidge wrote:


Eddie as i explain in my PM. I have not seen many comedians make direct dark humour at the death of a specific child
Yes comedians make dead baby jokes, but they are never directed at any individual as you did here.
Hence it was really in pooor taste. You may not agree, but clearly many people feel this is the case.

Ben did the same to me once making light of the holocaust, claiming to place me in an oven. He saw how poor that was. 
He is not Jewish and Jewish comedians are about the only people who can get away with such jokes

The point is your joke crossed a line, as it was targeted specifically at this individual

thanks for the green didge, nice to see you here again.  seems a while since we spoke

@ everyone,,,,,,,,here's the thing though

i showed my daughter the comments and her immediate reaction was ''omg i can hear daddy saying that to Rob'' (one of hubbys friends).  they were terrible together.  rob had 4 girls and when they were young and hubby went over to his house.  when he was leaving he would joke and pretend to go up the stairs undoing his trousers saying ''just gonna say goodnight to your girls, rob''.

i've been surrounded by dark humour for years.

in the care home death, disease, dementia, depression, i can tell you dark jokes were very much commonplace

my brother still works in intensive care and has probably seen countless people die.  again dark jokes fly back and forth especially if one of them qualifies for a darwin award....there can be much hiliarity and someone just died.

of course these comments aren't made to the relatives, but they are still said so when i saw the comments it didn't faze me at all.

HOWEVER, for those who don't have my dysfunctional family life where everyone gets completely roasted, i can understand how others would be shocked/disappointed/disgusted etc.

people have every right to think and feel and say what they like in reaction to the comments

but i will just say again

y'all have known eddie and ben for best part of 10 years or more.  you all know they are fun loving caring people.  are you all prepared to judge so harshly based on a couple of comments that were inappropriate  and crass?

Are they though? I'm not so sure.

Vintage already pointed out the "dark humour" between hospital staff or whoever. It's still horrible and crass, and they should be ashamed.

Don't like the sound of your husband. Were they very young girls?

gelico wrote:

phildidge wrote:


Eddie as i explain in my PM. I have not seen many comedians make direct dark humour at the death of a specific child
Yes comedians make dead baby jokes, but they are never directed at any individual as you did here.
Hence it was really in pooor taste. You may not agree, but clearly many people feel this is the case.

Ben did the same to me once making light of the holocaust, claiming to place me in an oven. He saw how poor that was. 
He is not Jewish and Jewish comedians are about the only people who can get away with such jokes

The point is your joke crossed a line, as it was targeted specifically at this individual

thanks for the green didge, nice to see you here again.  seems a while since we spoke

@ everyone,,,,,,,,here's the thing though

i showed my daughter the comments and her immediate reaction was ''omg i can hear daddy saying that to Rob'' (one of hubbys friends).  they were terrible together.  rob had 4 girls and when they were young and hubby went over to his house.  when he was leaving he would joke and pretend to go up the stairs undoing his trousers saying ''just gonna say goodnight to your girls, rob''.

i've been surrounded by dark humour for years.

in the care home death, disease, dementia, depression, i can tell you dark jokes were very much commonplace

my brother still works in intensive care and has probably seen countless people die.  again dark jokes fly back and forth especially if one of them qualifies for a darwin award....there can be much hiliarity and someone just died.

of course these comments aren't made to the relatives, but they are still said so when i saw the comments it didn't faze me at all.

HOWEVER, for those who don't have my dysfunctional family life where everyone gets completely roasted, i can understand how others would be shocked/disappointed/disgusted etc.

people have every right to think and feel and say what they like in reaction to the comments

but i will just say again

y'all have known eddie and ben for best part of 10 years or more.  you all know they are fun loving caring people.  are you all prepared to judge so harshly based on a couple of comments that were inappropriate  and crass?

You are welcome Gelico

The issue though Gelico, is when people expect others to hold the same humour as others. I find many things funny and like you say some people grow up with really dark humnour

I am not having a go at Eddie and I even sent her a Pm on this and never had a go

Neither am I now. I am simple saying and explaining how to me and many people some jokes do cross the line

I mean my family rip each other to bits, but here and again I think when jokes are specific to a child that has just died and how people feel towards children. The later being more the point. Is how and why this kind of joke will often nose dive and be seen as insensitive to people

Eddie is not also immune from criticism and i am not judging her as a person. I think the world of ben and Eddie, but people can and rightly be critical of what someone says. I know this more than anyone, because I happen to be one of the most outspoken on here and it often lands me in trouble. So I am not judging Eddie herself, I am critical of the joke itself. As I say when jokes are like this specifically directed. Its of course going to receive a strong backlash. Its not a snowflake reaction, but more a reaction how people feel for the family here with their loss.

Raggamuffin wrote:

gelico wrote:

you never responded to mine either

i've asked you 3 times if you consider yourself a better person than ben or eddie based on the fact that you didn't/wouldn't make such remarks......you never answered.

I did answer, just not in the way that you liked. It was a trick question, and it was irrelevant. I do find you a bit aggressive, especially after that story where you abused a school employee and dragged her parents into it.

it wasn't a trick question at all.

i honestly wanted to know

if you don't want to answer, that's ok

**abused** hahahaha. well, i can tell you the other women in the office looked well chuffed and had a hard job hiding their sniggers so from their manner i could guess she was just as much of a jumped up, arrogant POS with them as she was with me.

furthermore, her dismissal of my son being beaten up, her refusal to give me a name of a teacher who i could contact, her general unhelpful manner and her unfortunate choice of looking and talking down to me was something that i found quite aggressive and abusive so i was just giving her a bit back

if my so called aggression stops me being walked over and sorts out problems then so be it

i'm happy with that

Raggamuffin wrote:

gelico wrote:

thanks for the green didge, nice to see you here again.  seems a while since we spoke

@ everyone,,,,,,,,here's the thing though

i showed my daughter the comments and her immediate reaction was ''omg i can hear daddy saying that to Rob'' (one of hubbys friends).  they were terrible together.  rob had 4 girls and when they were young and hubby went over to his house.  when he was leaving he would joke and pretend to go up the stairs undoing his trousers saying ''just gonna say goodnight to your girls, rob''.

i've been surrounded by dark humour for years.

in the care home death, disease, dementia, depression, i can tell you dark jokes were very much commonplace

my brother still works in intensive care and has probably seen countless people die.  again dark jokes fly back and forth especially if one of them qualifies for a darwin award....there can be much hiliarity and someone just died.

of course these comments aren't made to the relatives, but they are still said so when i saw the comments it didn't faze me at all.

HOWEVER, for those who don't have my dysfunctional family life where everyone gets completely roasted, i can understand how others would be shocked/disappointed/disgusted etc.

people have every right to think and feel and say what they like in reaction to the comments

but i will just say again

y'all have known eddie and ben for best part of 10 years or more.  you all know they are fun loving caring people.  are you all prepared to judge so harshly based on a couple of comments that were inappropriate  and crass?

Are they though? I'm not so sure.

Vintage already pointed out the "dark humour" between hospital staff or whoever. It's still horrible and crass, and they should be ashamed.

Don't like the sound of your husband. Were they very young girls?

Its a coping mechanism, of what they have to deal with on a daily bases

Its something they basically only share between themselves and not generally others

Gelico's late husband, through the stories Gelico has shared. Sounds to me, to have been the best parent and husband going in my opinion.
So dont start knocking Gelico's husband, when you know nothing about him, that is simple a cheap shot

gelico wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

I did answer, just not in the way that you liked. It was a trick question, and it was irrelevant. I do find you a bit aggressive, especially after that story where you abused a school employee and dragged her parents into it.

it wasn't a trick question at all.  

i honestly wanted to know

if you don't want to answer, that's ok

**abused** hahahaha.  well, i can tell you the other women in the office looked well chuffed and had a hard job hiding their sniggers so from their manner i could guess she was just as much of a jumped up, arrogant POS with them as she was with me.

furthermore, her dismissal of my son being beaten up, her refusal to give me a name of a teacher who i could contact, her general unhelpful manner and her unfortunate choice of looking and talking down to me was something that i found quite aggressive and abusive so i was just giving her a bit back

if my so called aggression stops me being walked over and sorts out problems then so be it

i'm happy with that

I'm sure you are happy with that, but you sound like an idiot to me. Why would you drag her parents into it?