Parents responsible for care of their elderly mothers and fathers as much as their own children, minister says

Parents have as much of a responsibility to care for their elderly mothers and fathers as they do for their own children, a minister has suggested.

David Mowat, the care minister, said that Britain's ageing population means that society has to take greater responsibility for the elderly.

He said that he was "struck" by the fact that while nobody questions the fact that mothers and fathers care for their own children, society does not take the same approach to the elderly.

It came as council leaders warned last night that the UK's social care system is in "grave danger of falling apart" because of underfunding.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/01/31/parents-responsible-care-elderlymothers-fathers-much-children/



I have to say I agree. To me, they spent the best part of their lives raising their children and never gave up on them. So why are these same children not repaying them for the years given to them? There is no excuse not to either. Claims to health problems are faced by those parents themselves when they raised their children with severe health problems. They never threw in the towel on their children, but showered them with love. So people who offer that up as an excuse, is to me a copout. People should help look after their parents and it would save the country a fortune.

I agree adult children should do everything they can to help their parents in old age.
I have seen plenty who do sod all, then when something goes wrong they are quick to blame everyone but themselves for their parents ill health, misery, even death.

I hope this is not just another cop out by the government though...to wash their hands of the plight of the elderly.
Money needs to be ploughed into caring for the old, passing the buck is the cowards way out.

Many elderly with various forms of dementia, alzheimers, physical disabilities need professional 24/7 care.
Not only is it irresponsible to suggest family members should provide this, it's downright dangerous.

Maybe David Mowat should spend more time in care and nursing homes, he would see the level of care needed.

Syl wrote:I agree adult children should do everything they can to help their parents in old age.
I have seen plenty who do sod all, then when something goes wrong they are quick to blame everyone but themselves for their parents ill health, misery, even death.

I hope this is not just another cop out by the government though...to wash their hands of the plight of the elderly.
Money needs to be ploughed into caring for the old, passing the buck is the cowards way out.

Many elderly with various forms of dementia, alzheimers, physical disabilities need professional 24/7 care.
Not only is it irresponsible to suggest family members should provide this, it's downright dangerous.

Maybe David Mowat should spend more time in care and nursing homes, he would see the level of care needed.

But so do children with severe illnesses need constant care 24 hours a say Syl. Why is it dangerous for looking after the elderly, but not children? Carers at best have minimal training in the medical field, so I am at a loss how you think its dangerous? I think family member's should help out and do far more for their parents. To me to place imaginary barriers, as if they cannot do this, when they can, is what is wrong. There is no reason why people cannot care for their parents, and placing up a reason of its difficulties, is no reason at all, but an excuse in my book. Of course sometimes its not always possible because of work commitments or young families, but in many cases, people can have their parents live with them and have carers, or be the carers themselves.

Thorin wrote:

Syl wrote:I agree adult children should do everything they can to help their parents in old age.
I have seen plenty who do sod all, then when something goes wrong they are quick to blame everyone but themselves for their parents ill health, misery, even death.

I hope this is not just another cop out by the government though...to wash their hands of the plight of the elderly.
Money needs to be ploughed into caring for the old, passing the buck is the cowards way out.

Many elderly with various forms of dementia, alzheimers, physical disabilities need professional 24/7 care.
Not only is it irresponsible to suggest family members should provide this, it's downright dangerous.

Maybe David Mowat should spend more time in care and nursing homes, he would see the level of care needed.

But so do children with severe illnesses need constant care 24 hours a say Syl. Why is it dangerous for looking after the elderly, but not children? Carers at best have minimal training in the medical field, so I am at a loss how you think its dangerous? I think family member's should help out and do far more for their parents. To me to place imaginary barriers, as if they cannot do this, when they can, is what is wrong. There is no reason why people cannot care for their parents, and placing up a reason of its difficulties, is no reason at all, but an excuse in my book. Of course sometimes its not always possible because of work commitments or young families, but in many cases, people can have their parents live with them and have carers, or be the carers themselves.

I think the dangers are very real not imagined Thor.
Looking at it logically, by the time parents may need care, the adult children could be elderly and in ill health themselves.
Lifting and turning another adult is not like lifting a child.

Parents with handicapped or disabled children can usually dedicate themselves more to caring than an adult who may still be rearing children and also working full time.

Many elderly parents don't want to "be a burden" on their families.

Some dementia ridden adults are a danger to themselves and their families if they are not watched ALL the time....which is impossible for most people trying to care at home.

After saying all that, believe me I find it as abhorrent as anyone when offsprings don't do all they can to help an ailing parent.....I could go into details here but I wont.

Syl wrote:

Thorin wrote:

But so do children with severe illnesses need constant care 24 hours a say Syl. Why is it dangerous for looking after the elderly, but not children? Carers at best have minimal training in the medical field, so I am at a loss how you think its dangerous? I think family member's should help out and do far more for their parents. To me to place imaginary barriers, as if they cannot do this, when they can, is what is wrong. There is no reason why people cannot care for their parents, and placing up a reason of its difficulties, is no reason at all, but an excuse in my book. Of course sometimes its not always possible because of work commitments or young families, but in many cases, people can have their parents live with them and have carers, or be the carers themselves.

I think the dangers are very real not imagined Thor.
Looking at it logically, by the time parents may need care, the adult children could be elderly and in ill health themselves.
Lifting and turning another adult is not like lifting a child.

Parents with handicapped or disabled children can usually dedicate themselves more to caring than an adult who may still be rearing children and also working full time.

Many elderly parents don't want to "be a burden" on their families.

Some dementia ridden adults are a danger to themselves and their families if they are not watched ALL the time....which is impossible for most people trying to care at home.

After saying all that, believe me I find it as abhorrent as anyone when offsprings don't do all they can to help an ailing parent.....I could go into details here but I wont.

Sorry but parents spend their lives looking after their handicapped children well into adulthood, who have to lift them as well. Again what is needed is training and understanding Manuel handling or equipment to help ease this burden. So again that to me is an excuse Syl, of people putting up excuses not to help.

Its true many of the elderly dont want to be a burden to their families, or anyone, including carers, but the reality is they sometimes simply need them. There is a poor ethos in this country that creates this in the first place. One where we think its wrong to take help from people. We see it in how we portray people on benefits etc, that then people do not want to be seen as takers. The media and people drive this feeling which then has a poor knock on effect to the elderly, wrongly thinking they are a burden.

You can have parents with dementia at your home and live in carers, which some of the family can be or outside carers, so again to me that is saying people cannot look after them from home, when already people can do look after their parents Syl. Its too easy now for people to ship off their parents into home and it destroys what little dignity and self respect they have left.

Well we both have different viewpoints no doubt coloured by our own experiences Thor. I respect your viewpoint.

Every case is different. I doubt anyone who truly loves their parent ever wants them to be cared for by professionals, but sometimes it's the best or only option.

Maybe other people have their own views on this.

Syl wrote:Well we both have different viewpoints no doubt coloured by our own experiences Thor. I respect your viewpoint.

Every case is different. I doubt anyone who truly loves their parent ever wants them to be cared for by professionals, but sometimes it's the best or only option.

Maybe other people have their own views on this.

No worries Syl, you know i respect your viewpoint, even at times if we do not agree.