How controversial is it to kiss your child on the lips?

This picture of Victoria Beckham kissing her daughter Harper on the lips has already been liked more than half a million times. But there has also been a backlash against it. Why?




No, it's not the matching sunglasses that people are discussing. It's a mother giving her five-year-old daughter a birthday kiss - on the lips. "Gorgeous picture," writes one person. "Beautiful picture! Shows the love between mother and daughter," posts another, echoing the sentiments of most people.

But a quick glance at the comments beneath Victoria Beckham's Instagram post indicates that not everyone sees it the same way. "It's nice but you're not supposed to kiss you're children on the lips. I'm not trying to be rude but it's true," comments one detractor. Another wrote: "Not a fan of kissing my kids on the lips..That's just me."

While these comments, and others like them, stop of short of full-on criticism of the fashion designer's actions, they express a vague sense of unease about the image - an unease that has, in turn, caused consternation among others.

BBC Trending consulted the social etiquette expert, Liz Brewer. She believes that while kissing a son or daughter on the lips is an unusual practice it should still be a parent's choice as to whether they consider it appropriate or not.
"Normally with a member of your family you don't kiss on the lips unless it's your husband," she said. "With children, I wouldn't have thought it's a particularly good habit to get into but it's her child and she's at liberty to do what she thinks is best."
"I would be uncomfortable doing that and I think most people would be. If she feels it's appropriate, so be it. I wouldn't say it sets a particularly good example."
It's an issue which has caused discomfort before."I find it a bit icky," says one contributor on a Mumsnet discussion thread. "It's only weird if you use tongues," responds another.
This is not the first parent-child picture this year to stir controversy. This image of a father holding his sick son in the shower drew negative and positive reactions with some claiming it is inappropriate at best and at worst has undertones of paedophilia.



http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-trending-36775203


I fail to see how one wouldn't want to kiss their child on the lips! I love my two wholeheartedly and from the depths of my soul. It is a love between a parent and child and of course it stops organically. I don't kiss my fifteen year old son on the lips for instance, I took his lead with that and he stopped at about nine or ten. He now kisses me on my head or wraps his arms around me and kisses my cheek.
I don't see the problem with it.

My grand parents - my folks - and I; those lips were to be saved for your love of your life - husband & wife and that just seemed to make perfect sense to me! 

I don't know why ...those photo's make me squirm more then photo's of peoples dogs make their faces a slobbery mess from happy greetings!

Wow. It's just a way of saying "I love you"!

I agree when they get older it's not right and I also wouldn't kiss my child on the lips if I'd just been drinking alcohol, smoking or having sex - that's just common sense.

I don't like the bottom picture much. There's absolutely nothing wrong with the action, it's putting it online that is a bit stupid.

KISSING on the lips only looks okay with one's own when they're still babies and young toddlers...

AS THE children get older, it will look more and more unseemly..

AS FOR posting such pic's publicly online that's just not right.

WhoseYourWolfie wrote:

KISSING on the lips only looks okay with one's own when they're still babies and young toddlers...

AS THE children get older, it will look more and more unseemly..

AS FOR posting such pic's publicly online that's just not right.

I agree. I'd only kiss my own on the lips anyway. I don't think she was wrong to post it online - I wouldn't do it, but that's personal choice.

eddie wrote:Wow. It's just a way of saying "I love you"!

I agree when they get older it's not right and I also wouldn't kiss my child on the lips if I'd just been drinking alcohol, smoking or having sex - that's just common sense.

That's what the foreheads and cheeks were for --- not the 'LIPS' ... Naaaa, not on children - not even our own, having a little boy with asthmatic issues, even allowing anyone to get that close to his face let alone thinking that they could KISS HIS MOUTH - OMG, I'd have smacked them upside the head!    LOL

I kissed my son a lot....not on the lips though.

I read once that the majority of people who suffer from cold sores on the mouth caught the infection when small by an adult kissing them on the mouth.

I have a friend who still kisses both her lads on the lips (just a peck obviously) but they are in their 30's and it makes me squirm a bit.

The second pic bothers me because why would you take a pic of your sick child like that?? and why the hell would you post it online.....very odd.

Just reading the thread....maybe it's a generational issue.

Could be. When I was young, there were lots of families that did that. I remember my boss, when I drove a grocery lorry, would often send his son of around 13-years along to help. They--father and son--would greet by kissing on the lips.

I thought that was weird, but eventually I concluded I was the one who was weird. They had a great father/son relationship.

It probably depends on the way you were brought up yourself too.
My mum was very caring, but she was certainly not a kisser or a hugger....not to us and not to anyone.
She was one of those people who hated being hugged or kissed socially, she did soften towards the end of her life though.....so I managed to get a few good cuddles in at the end.

trouble with this sort of issue is that there are far too many "experts" out there on social media who just love to spout their irrelevant pov.....and just as many idiots willing to listen to them....

I don't believe there is a right or wrong way, just personal preference.

I never did it.

Well I love kissing my daughter on the lips. We don't do it all the time as I actually prefer kissing her squidgy cheeks. She's a very affectionate human, like me, but also likes her space, like me.

The one thing I don't like is when adults try to make their kids kiss people. I know a woman like that. She gets her kids to call all her friends (fair weather or other) "auntie" and says "Give Auntie whoever a kiss!"

I don't make my kids kiss anyone they don't want to. It's funny, but children really take a shine to some people and a dislike to others.

eddie wrote:I don't like the bottom picture much. There's absolutely nothing wrong with the action, it's putting it online that is a bit stupid.

Indeed!

Ffs some things should be private! That's the problem these days no one wants privacy they are all just attention seeking twits.

Anyway it depends on the age of the child TBH

I'd kiss my kids when they were younger now that they are teenagers No way! lol I'd be lucky to get a peck on the cheeks!