Lunatic beats arsehole in Iowa Republican Caucus

Ted Cruz has defeated Donald Trump in the first Iowa Caucus in what experts are hailing as a victory for lunatics over arseholes everywhere.


Cruz beat Republican front-runner Trump with 28% of the vote, compared to Trump’s 24%, confirming that over half of all Republicans would be happy with either a lunatic or an arsehole as President of the United States.

American Political analyst Simon Williams told us, “Cruz’s victory is a bit of a shock, sure, but he does take many positions that are incredibly popular with registered Republicans – in that he hates social healthcare, and is a gun-obsessed god botherer.

“This is the strange thing, if you’re a Republican, right now a man who thinks the Earth is a thousand years old and denies that climate change is real, actually looks an attractive prospect when standing next to Donald Trump.
“That’s how low Donald Trump has take the Republican movement.

“I would imagine in a couple of months time a Republican candidate throwing their own faeces into the crowd will start to look attractive compared to Donald Trump.

“Watch this space.”

http://newsthump.com/2016/02/02/lunatic-beats-arsehole-in-iowa-republican-caucus/?utm_campaign=shareaholic&utm_medium=twitter&utm_source=socialnetwork




Think that says it all!!!!!

Shortly before 3:00 am local time on Tuesday morning, the count was finally done in Iowa. MSNBC declared the former Secretary of State the “apparent winner” of the 2016 Iowa Democratic caucus in the narrowest result in party history. She defeated opponent Bernie Sanders by five votes, 700-695, becoming the first woman to ever win an Iowa caucus.

Of the 44 national delegates at stake, Clinton won 29; Sanders, 21. Per the state Democratic party statement, Clinton was awarded 699.57 state delegate equivalents; Senator Sanders got 695.49. The presence of Martin O’Malley in the race mattered, after all. The former Maryland governor, who suspended his campaign on Monday night, earned only 7.68 state delegate equivalents, more than the difference between Clinton and Sanders. The only remaining outstanding delegates, in the Des Moines precinct, wouldn’t make up the Sanders deficit.


The Clinton campaign released a statement that read, in part, “After thorough reporting—and analysis—of results, there is no uncertainty and Secretary Clinton has clearly won the most national and state delegates. Statistically, there is no outstanding information that could change the results and and no way that Senator Sanders could overcome Secretary Clinton’s advantage.”

Shortly after landing in New Hampshire, Sanders spoke to MSNBC reporter Kasie Hunt. When asked whether he would contest the vote count, he said, “Honestly, we just got off the plane and we don’t know enough to say anything about it.”

https://newrepublic.com/minutes/128968/hillary-clinton-wins-iowa-hair


Bloody hell, you have such a complicated system!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!