I'm sorry your son's autistic but you stilll need to control him

Chatting to my neighbor and her son is autistic. Said I'd do some research for her and whilst doing so came across the thread on a forum.
Would like to know your thoughts:



I'm sorry your son's autistic but you stilll need to control him
Dear Lady,

I'm sorry your child has autism, and I understand that it must be frustrating not be able go on outings with him like you would a non-autistic child, but that doesn't mean that all the rest of us should just put up and shut up when he's yelling/moaning for 15 minutes straight during the Avengers movie. I agree that your paying for his ticket means that he has just as much right to enjoy the movie you as the rest of us, but that doesn't mean he can ruin the movie for the rest of us. Perhaps in the future you might consider an activity for him that is less likely to overstimulate. Or leaving him with a sitter when you take the rest of your children to the movie, or accept the fact that you may have to take him out of the theater and miss part of the movie if he starts acting up. Simply telling those around you who complain that he is autistic is not sufficient.

Further the fact that the the manager of the theater nicely but firmly told you that they would give you your money back but that you needed to leave doesn't mean that he is racist or that this is a "white" theater. There were a varied collection of ethnicities in the audience who appeared to be unmolested by the staff, (and who were glad to see you and your child escorted out). I also skeptical that you will be able to find a "black" theater where such behavior is welcomed despite your comments to the contrary.


See the thread http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=653818

The old race card eh?.

People don't understand Autism,and it can be annoying when they shout or jump up and down.

I would suggest she took him on a day when it's quiet, so if he does shout he won't be disturbing too many people. Maybe she could reach an understanding with the Manager. Failing this, as much as she feels her son has a right to go, she can't expect others to not moan when their viewing is spoiled.

Yes that's pretty much the standard response on the thread I linked to.

It's a real shame though. It would be nice if certain cinemas could organise a day in every month or whatever, to have special screenings.

That's the trouble with cinemas IMO, some people act like they're in their own front room and get their phones out, talk loudly and generally don't keep quiet.

In England they have days when they can take disabled children, or used to, not sure anymore, but maybe they could do that there.

Don't cinemas still have matinees? If not they should.
That was when kids could make as much noise as they liked....which they certainly did, and it was enjoyed by all.

I do feel for the other cinema goers. I think if a child hasn't settled down within 5 minutes or so the parent should remove them till they do.

I know it must be very hard to bring up an autistic child, but my son was hyperactive, and though obviously not as severely handicapped as an autistic child his behaviour could be unpredictable and disruptive at times.
If he started in a public place where other people were trying to enjoy a meal or a film....we would remove him till he calmed down.

Yes they do still do matinees, but it's not all noise and chaos.
It's a shame. Autism is still really misunderstood in this world.

Matinees used to be when the kids could act like kids in the picture houses....mind you I am going back a bit.
Yes, I think ALL mental illness (or differences) is misunderstood.

There are varying degrees of Autism, some children react more than others. It's a shame more resources arnt put in place whereby any child with special needs, could go pictures once a week, and enjoy it and not affecting anyone else.

THAT MOTHER isn't doing herself any favours by trying to play a "triple header" in her card hand --  the victim card, then the Autism card to add some emotional and/or guilt leverage, then finally the 'race' card...

Many cinemas down here have a couple of sessions each week aimed at mothers with babies and toddlers, and a couple of sessions each month aimed towards special needs/intellectually disabled groups..