Mum is asked to leave shop because her child is having a tantrum.

An assistant in the John Lewis department store rudely asked a young mother to leave the shop because her child was having a tantrum.
He said other customers had complained, and escorted the embarrassed mum out of the shop.

Over reaction from him or should customers be able to shop in peace without putting up with screaming toddlers?



http://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/mum-told-leave-john-lewis-10998605

It depends on how long it had been going on. If it had gone on for a while, I would have expected her to take the kid out herself.

Raggamuffin wrote:It depends on how long it had been going on. If it had gone on for a while, I would have expected her to take the kid out herself.

Well she said she was in the middle of buying something, she tried to calm the toddler down and was attempting to put her reins back on.....sometimes toddlers go from calm to screaming pitch suddenly.
I cant see other customers complaining.....it's a fact of life kids cry, sometimes noisily.

Syl wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:It depends on how long it had been going on. If it had gone on for a while, I would have expected her to take the kid out herself.

Well she said she was in the middle of buying something, she tried to calm the toddler down and was attempting to put her reins back on.....sometimes toddlers go from calm to screaming pitch suddenly.
I cant see other customers complaining.....it's a fact of life kids cry, sometimes noisily.

LOL, they would not have been been able to handle what my eldest used to do with her boys, if they had a screaming tantrum, she'd sit on the floor and do exactly what they did.  They'd stop really quick in absolute horror lol

Syl wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:It depends on how long it had been going on. If it had gone on for a while, I would have expected her to take the kid out herself.

Well she said she was in the middle of buying something, she tried to calm the toddler down and was attempting to put her reins back on.....sometimes toddlers go from calm to screaming pitch suddenly.
I cant see other customers complaining.....it's a fact of life kids cry, sometimes noisily.

Why wouldn't they complain? Maybe they wanted a nice shopping trip without getting their eardrums burst. The sales assistant said there had been complaints. Come to that, why should retail staff have to listen to that?

Raggamuffin wrote:

Syl wrote:

Well she said she was in the middle of buying something, she tried to calm the toddler down and was attempting to put her reins back on.....sometimes toddlers go from calm to screaming pitch suddenly.
I cant see other customers complaining.....it's a fact of life kids cry, sometimes noisily.

Why wouldn't they complain? Maybe they wanted a nice shopping trip without getting their eardrums burst. The sales assistant said there had been complaints. Come to that, why should retail staff have to listen to that?

If retail staff could pick and choose which customers came into their shop they would soon be out of business.
Obviously John Lewis don't agree with the actions of the assistant...they are doing some back tracking.

sassy wrote:

Syl wrote:

Well she said she was in the middle of buying something, she tried to calm the toddler down and was attempting to put her reins back on.....sometimes toddlers go from calm to screaming pitch suddenly.
I cant see other customers complaining.....it's a fact of life kids cry, sometimes noisily.

LOL, they would not have been been able to handle what my eldest used to do with her boys, if they had a screaming tantrum, she'd sit on the floor and do exactly what they did.  They'd stop really quick in absolute horror lol

There was a brilliant TV ad a couple of years ago where the mum did exactly that same thing.

Syl wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Why wouldn't they complain? Maybe they wanted a nice shopping trip without getting their eardrums burst. The sales assistant said there had been complaints. Come to that, why should retail staff have to listen to that?

If retail staff could  pick and choose which customers came into their shop they would soon be out of business.
Obviously John Lewis don't agree with the actions of the assistant...they are doing some back tracking.

I'm not saying they should pick and choose, but they shouldn't have to put up with wailing. The woman should have taken the kid out. Most retailers apologise to customers, whether they agree with them or not.

Syl wrote:

sassy wrote:


LOL, they would not have been been able to handle what my eldest used to do with her boys, if they had a screaming tantrum, she'd sit on the floor and do exactly what they did.  They'd stop really quick in absolute horror lol

There was a brilliant TV ad a couple of years ago where the mum did exactly that same thing.

I hated that advert! It was for Vicks First Defence. She didn't even pick up the things the kid had thrown on the floor. Do people think it's fine to just let your kid throw things around in a shop?

She probably gave her cold to the staff as well.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Syl wrote:

There was a brilliant TV ad a couple of years ago where the mum did exactly that same thing.

I hated that advert! It was for Vicks First Defence. She didn't even pick up the things the kid had thrown on the floor. Do people think it's fine to just let your kid throw things around in a shop?

She probably gave her cold to the staff as well.

That woman is so up herself. She expected an apology from the member of staff? in her dreams. She says she was in the quietest corner of the shop - well it wasn't very quiet after she went there was it?

Kids usually throw tantrums because they get something at the end of it.

A smart slap on the bum?

nicko wrote:A smart slap on the bum?

I don't think even that's necessary if a child understands boundaries and you say 'no' enough and mean no.  It's when parents say no, then cave, and the child then equates throwing a thrombie with getting its own way.  Kids aren't daft, they learn manipulation from a very young age.

My son was hyperactive.....shopping with him was a minefield.
But the worst thing was when interfering bystanders chose to make comment.
Shopping in public places all members of society mix and a degree of understanding should be shown.

Syl wrote:My son was hyperactive.....shopping with him was a minefield.
But the worst thing was when interfering bystanders chose to make comment.
Shopping in public places all members of society mix and a degree of understanding should be shown.

I think that people do understand generally, but they're only human - maybe they have a headache, or they're tired of noise pollution from other sources, so maybe they just really wanted a nice quiet lunch or a nice quiet shopping trip.

HoratioTarr wrote:Kids usually throw tantrums because they get something at the end of it.

Not always. Sometimes it's just a way to express themselves because they don't have the words needed.
I always found the best way was to ignore tantrums. It's not always possible to leave a shop immediately. My son had his most memorable ones in supermarket checkouts when I was half way through checking out.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Syl wrote:My son was hyperactive.....shopping with him was a minefield.
But the worst thing was when interfering bystanders chose to make comment.
Shopping in public places all members of society mix and a degree of understanding should be shown.

I think that people do understand generally, but they're only human - maybe they have a headache, or they're tired of noise pollution from other sources, so maybe they just really wanted a nice quiet lunch or a nice quiet shopping trip.

True....I was near a toddler who screamed (that high piercing scream that some kids have) not long ago....that was a tad irritating.
But had it been so bad as to be unbearable I would have removed myself from the vicinity rather than complain.
Most parents ime do something as soon as possible.

Seems everyone has an opinion now.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-35753732

I have the usual question to ask. Why on earth was this in the papers? I presume the woman went to the press with it. What is wrong with these people?

I agree....but on this occasion at least the toddler is pixilated out.

Hopefully a photo shoot of the child looking suitably sad wont follow.

Syl wrote:I agree....but on this occasion at least the toddler is pixilated out.

Hopefully a photo shoot of the child looking suitably sad wont follow.

I don't care about that! I mean why would someone go to the press and make a huge fuss about a sales assistant? Maybe he could have handled it better, but it's hardly headline news is it? Oh my word - a customer isn't happy in a shop - hold the front page!

These people need to get a grip and stop their stupid attention seeking. It happens more and more these days - people don't like something and off they go to make a huge fuss on the internet or in the papers. Are they really that desperate to get their name and photo out there?

Once something is put on Facebook and the like it can suddenly go viral and become news....that's if it can be seen by everyone.
I'm not struck on people who seek attention this way, usually using their kids.

It's certainly one way to get revenge on the person who has upset you though.

Syl wrote:Once something is put on Facebook and the like it can suddenly go viral and become news....that's if it can be seen by everyone.
I'm not struck on people who seek attention this way, usually using their kids.

It's certainly one way to get revenge on the person who has upset you though.

I don't think that John Lewis should have dignified her attention seeking with a public statement. They should not say a word publically about their own staff like that. It's all totally pathetic.

On the scale of things it is, on the other hand if I had young kids with me I would avoid john Lewis's just in case they had a tantrum and I was made to feel like a shop lifter being escorted from the premises.

HoratioTarr wrote:

nicko wrote:A smart slap on the bum?

I don't think even that's necessary if a child understands boundaries and you say 'no' enough and mean no.  It's when parents say no, then cave, and the child then equates throwing a thrombie with getting its own way.  Kids aren't daft, they learn manipulation from a very young age.

You're right. I have seen mum's say no, then give them the very thing where out of the shop - one of my friends was terrible for it.
It's either luck, or because my children know I won't take shit, that I have never had to deal with tantrums.

I always let my children take a toy out with them when we go shopping, like a little play figure, and if they ever started to try and play up, I'd say "Give me that toy, if you carry on its going in the bin...right?!" in a very stern voice.

Soon shut them up.

If they were really good all day, and it is boring for them to go shopping, then I'd always get them a little treat, like chocolate or a small toy and say "thank you for being good, I'm very proud of what a big boy/girl you've been"

That usually works too.

Some parents don't think like children; give them something to do! Let them help you "pick something" - if you're looking for some dishes or t-shirts....whatever it is, ask them to help you find the right colour/size etc

My son tidied up all the bras in marks and Spencer's once!!

HT wrote:Kids aren't daft, they learn manipulation from a very young age.

So true. Instead of feeling sorry for the mum, we should recognize that this is usually the result of bad parenting.

Hyperactive disorder aside. I recognize there are behavioral disorders.

eddie wrote:

HoratioTarr wrote:

I don't think even that's necessary if a child understands boundaries and you say 'no' enough and mean no.  It's when parents say no, then cave, and the child then equates throwing a thrombie with getting its own way.  Kids aren't daft, they learn manipulation from a very young age.

You're right. I have seen mum's say no, then give them the very thing where out of the shop - one of my friends was terrible for it.
It's either luck, or because my children know I won't take shit, that I have never had to deal with tantrums.

I always let my children take a toy out with them when we go shopping, like a little play figure, and if they ever started to try and play up, I'd say "Give me that toy, if you carry on its going in the bin...right?!" in a very stern voice.

Soon shut them up.

If they were really good all day, and it is boring for them to go shopping, then I'd always get them a little treat, like chocolate or a small toy and say "thank you for being good, I'm very proud of what a big boy/girl you've been"

That usually works too.

Some parents don't think like children; give them something to do! Let them help you "pick something" - if you're looking for some dishes or t-shirts....whatever it is, ask them to help you find the right colour/size etc

My son tidied up all the bras in marks and Spencer's once!!

Good advice eddie....you were also lucky too.

Since the mid 90s I have spent more time in shopz than I care to remember and seen uncontrollable bratz all over the place, just look at some of their muntuz ooooops I mean muthuz and it is apparent why they are bratz.
In the Kingfisher today, 2 bratz in there kicked off and the muthuz could not have cared one Toyota about everyone else.
As we walked past one of them their noise followed us to the exit.
Sign of the times, to many very young inexperience in life, promiscuous tartz having babiz with any Tom, Dick and Abdul when they are still children themselves.
We have 4 generationz of these typez now.

Stormee wrote:Since the mid 90s I have spent more time in shopz than I care to remember and seen uncontrollable bratz all over the place, just look at some of their muntuz ooooops I mean muthuz and it is apparent why they are bratz.
In the Kingfisher today, 2 bratz in there kicked off and the muthuz could not have cared one Toyota about everyone else.
As we walked past one of them their noise followed us to the exit.
Sign of the times, to many very young inexperience in life, promiscuous tartz having babiz with any Tom, Dick and Abdul when they are still children themselves.
We have 4 generationz of these typez now.

It goes without saying that some kids play up because their parents (I include dads as well as mums here) are worse than useless.
But kids who have wonderful parents have tantrums too.
I know....cos my son did.

Syl wrote:

Stormee wrote:Since the mid 90s I have spent more time in shopz than I care to remember and seen uncontrollable bratz all over the place, just look at some of their muntuz ooooops I mean muthuz and it is apparent why they are bratz.
In the Kingfisher today, 2 bratz in there kicked off and the muthuz could not have cared one Toyota about everyone else.
As we walked past one of them their noise followed us to the exit.
Sign of the times, to many very young inexperience in life, promiscuous tartz having babiz with any Tom, Dick and Abdul when they are still children themselves.
We have 4 generationz of these typez now.

It goes without saying that some kids play up because their parents (I include dads as well as mums here) are worse than useless.
But kids who have wonderful parents have tantrums too.
I know....cos my son did.

How did you restrain yourself enough to give a polite reply to that post?

I'm used to Stormee.

Syl wrote:
I'm used to Stormee.

Hate to say it, but perhaps that is Stormee's problem.  If everybody pointed out to him how disgusting his posts are, it might just make him realise.  I quite sure he does it for effect anyway, just like he puts on his stupid spelling, then will suddenly post properly.  He's a fraud from beginning to end.

sassy wrote:

Syl wrote:
I'm used to Stormee.

Hate to say it, but perhaps that is Stormee's problem.  If everybody pointed out to him how disgusting his posts are, it might just make him realise.  I quite sure he does it for effect anyway, just like he puts on his stupid spelling, then will suddenly post properly.  He's a fraud from beginning to end.

Why should they? You can if you like, but it's up to others what they do.

Some of storm's post was also true. He just worded it in a very base way.

I agree with Rags and Eddie Sassy.

There are several people here who hold extreme views on various subjects, you included. Nothing anyone says bothers me unduly....I don't have to agree with it but people are entitled to say it as long as they are not breaking any laws.

Re Stormees last post here, I agree there are some absolutely useless mothers around....probably more today than ever....one parent families are one cause, and there are plenty of them around.
The Toms, Dicks, Harrys (and Abduls) freely impregnate women because they no longer have to take responsibilty......they just move on to the next stupidly willing partner...and so it goes.

Ya ain't supposed to speak the truth Syl.

It is a really sad state of affairs though of which no doubt you have seen with your own eyez, young girlz getting such a bad start in life and their littlunz getting the same or worse.
When will it stop and us paying for them, it seemz we pay for everything

Stormee wrote:Since the mid 90s I have spent more time in shopz than I care to remember and seen uncontrollable bratz all over the place, just look at some of their muntuz ooooops I mean muthuz and it is apparent why they are bratz.
In the Kingfisher today, 2 bratz in there kicked off and the muthuz could not have cared one Toyota about everyone else.
As we walked past one of them their noise followed us to the exit.
Sign of the times, to many very young inexperience in life, promiscuous tartz having babiz with any Tom, Dick and Abdul when they are still children themselves.
We have 4 generationz of these typez now.

Wish your post wasn't accurate, but it is.

Of course it's accurate. It doesn't matter how you tart it up, it's true.

the truth is often unpaletable

Lord Foul wrote:the truth is often unpaletable

And they don't like it up 'em

Miffs2 wrote:

Lord Foul wrote:the truth is often unpaletable

And they don't like it up 'em

Mr. Mannering

Ooo-er!

Stormee wrote:

Miffs2 wrote:

And they don't like it up 'em

Mr. Mannering

Miffs2 wrote:

Lord Foul wrote:the truth is often unpaletable

And they don't like it up 'em

clearly they DO...which is why there are so many single mums with a gaggle of variedly fathered kids in tow.....

Lord Foul wrote:

Miffs2 wrote:

And they don't like it up 'em

clearly they DO...which is why there are so many single mums with a gaggle of variedly fathered kids in tow.....

"Tough titties" for those urban princesses with their spoilt brat attitudes and their overblown sense of entitlement...
Who do they think they are, seeming to believe that simply having a baby somehow makes them so special, that they can allow crying babies and unruly toddlers to make life so much worse for innocent shoppers, diners, theatre or church goers, etc., who just happen to be in the vacinity ?

Places like shops and restaraunts are mostly privately owned businesses, free as to how they handle noise and disturbances like this on their premises, within legal and decency boundaries..
To call that shop assistant "rude" in the story in the OP says more about the reporter, in my view, than it does about the shop;
And, as for that young mother appearing "embarrassed" - that probably says more about that reporter, again, as well...

Unless a shop, shopping centre or restaraunt has such facilities as parenting and crying rooms, than the onus is on the mother (or father if he's the one in charge, at the time..) to show some respect for others around them..
Some young mothers these days (not all, mind you - just a sizable minority..) seem to think that they're the only person in the room, wherever they go; feeling somehow more superior, simply because of the fact that they've dropped a couple of anklebiters onto an already overpopulated planet.

Well said!

Lord Foul wrote:

Miffs2 wrote:

And they don't like it up 'em

clearly they DO...which is why there are so many single mums with a gaggle of variedly fathered kids in tow.....

and VARIED COLOURED

My view is this.
The reality is during the day the most customers these places will have is mothers with babies and toddlers. That is not being sexist, just a reality of the situation. Thus it makes sense that shops should make their stores that much more friendly to children, where a small area could be created with toys to help distract children which in their situation must be mind numbingly boring being dragged around hours with one or both parents. I mean seriously, most children are inquisitive, excitable, hyper and most of all want to play. So as much as its difficult for parents, nobody tends to give a thought what its like for the child being carted around from shop to shop. This is why to me if an area is available in a shop which is there for children to have some much needed fun, this would make the fay far much more easier for everyone.  Just think if the store had such an area, the child would have easily been distracted by something new and fun.

Just a thought