Girl, 11, stops eating for two days after primary school said she was overweight

A fitness instructor has responded with anger after her 11-year-old daughter refused to eat for two days when school health professionals branded her overweight.Amelya Lyndsay, 35, was stunned when a routine height and weight measurement test at daughter Olivia's junior school claimed she was over the recommended BMI limit. Olivia - who at 5ft 2ins is one of the tallest pupils in her year - was so shaken by the conclusion that she refused to eat for two days.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/health/children/12094548/Girl-11-stops-eating-for-two-days-after-primary-school-said-she-was-overweight.html

I think a tad bit of common sense and tact is needed here with children of this age when tackling obesity.
Scary that she stopped eating, no wonder the mother is angry.
Like I say with kids they are going to be very sensitive to such issues and she hardly looks obese to me.

If the girl is indeed overweight, how come her mother didn't notice?

The body mass index goes off an average which is not fool proof to say whether is really overweight or not. Its not the best system, based on weight and height.

Didge wrote:The body mass index goes off an average which is not fool proof to say whether is really overweight or not. Its not the best system, based on weight and height.

I think it's quite good really for an average person. It might be a bit misleading if someone is very muscular I guess. There is a very wide range for your height, so if you're above the limit, the chances are that you're a bit porky.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:The body mass index goes off an average which is not fool proof to say whether is really overweight or not. Its not the best system, based on weight and height.

I think it's quite good really for an average person. It might be a bit misleading if someone is very muscular I guess. There is a very wide range for your height, so if you're above the limit, the chances are that you're a bit porky.

Again its not perfect and if they are slightly over at that age, I do think it should not be played out on as it has been here.. Again we are talking about an 11 year old year yet who has not fully developed that does not in anyway look obese.

Didge wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

I think it's quite good really for an average person. It might be a bit misleading if someone is very muscular I guess. There is a very wide range for your height, so if you're above the limit, the chances are that you're a bit porky.

Again its not perfect and if they are slightly over at that age, I do think it should not be played out on as it has been here.. Again we are talking about an 11 year old year yet who has not fully developed that does not in anyway look obese.

You can't really see enough of her to tell. Obese is not the same as a bit overweight.

Anyway, if she is a bit fat, her mother should have noticed, what with her being a fitness instructor, and she could suggest a healthy eating and exercise plan. If the girl really isn't fat, then the school needs to explain how they came to that conclusion.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:

Again its not perfect and if they are slightly over at that age, I do think it should not be played out on as it has been here.. Again we are talking about an 11 year old year yet who has not fully developed that does not in anyway look obese.

You can't really see enough of her to tell. Obese is not the same as a bit overweight.

Anyway, if she is a bit fat, her mother should have noticed, what with her being a fitness instructor, and she could suggest a healthy eating and exercise plan. If the girl really isn't fat, then the school needs to explain how they came to that conclusion.

Even if slightly overweight at that age more tact is needed, because we are fundemnetally talking about children here who have not mentally or physically developed yet Rags. I doubt her mother thought she was fat at all and neither do I from the picture as like I say she is 11 and will be soon in secondary school where they will do more intense sports. At 11 the way she looks I think such measures are a tad poor, when its clear she is not what I would class as fat

Didge wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

You can't really see enough of her to tell. Obese is not the same as a bit overweight.

Anyway, if she is a bit fat, her mother should have noticed, what with her being a fitness instructor, and she could suggest a healthy eating and exercise plan. If the girl really isn't fat, then the school needs to explain how they came to that conclusion.

Even if slightly overweight at that age more tact is needed, because we are fundemnetally talking about children here who have not mentally or physically developed yet Rags. I doubt her mother thought she was fat at all and neither do I from the picture as like I say she is 11 and will be soon in secondary school where they will do more intense sports. At 11 the way she looks I think such measures are a tad poor, when its clear she is not what I would class as fat

It says in the article that the school sent a letter to her mother, so perhaps it was her mother who let her read it.

I think that schools are to be commended for addressing the issue, what with the rise of childhood obesity and type 2 diabetes.

In addition to that, her mother must have gone to the press herself, and encouraged her own daughter to pose for a press photograph. If anyone is upsetting the girl, it's her mother.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:


Even if slightly overweight at that age more tact is needed, because we are fundemnetally talking about children here who have not mentally or physically developed yet Rags. I doubt her mother thought she was fat at all and neither do I from the picture as like I say she is 11 and will be soon in secondary school where they will do more intense sports. At 11 the way she looks I think such measures are a tad poor, when its clear she is not what I would class as fat

It says in the article that the school sent a letter to her mother, so perhaps it was her mother who let her read it.

I think that schools are to be commended for addressing the issue, what with the rise of childhood obesity and type 2 diabetes.

That is unclear, but it does seem unlikely, after it was two days that the mother then seemed to twig what was wrong. Its possible she did not received the letter to after this. I have no problem with schools addressing obesity, but there is again such a thing as tact dealing with children who are of an age where they are not mentally strong enough to understand many things. This is a prime example where it clearly effected this girl. Again she is only 11 and where there are children obese then yes every help should be given to tackle the problem, but again with tact.

Raggamuffin wrote:In addition to that, her mother must have gone to the press herself, and encouraged her own daughter to pose for a press photograph. If anyone is upsetting the girl, it's her mother.

I have to agree, I was going to ask why the school would tell the girl and not her parents. Sort of changes the entire complexion of the story -- it's a valuable service for the school nutritionist or nurse to warn parents if they think their children have a potential health problem.

It's possible that they gave the girl the sealed letter addressed to her mother. Never open a letter meant for someone else.

Raggamuffin wrote:It's possible that they gave the girl the sealed letter addressed to her mother. Never open a letter meant for someone else.

Possible -- which is why your schools should enter the 20th century and try these things called phones, or e-mail. Do the teachers still wear powdered wigs?

Raggamuffin wrote:It's possible that they gave the girl the sealed letter addressed to her mother. Never open a letter meant for someone else.

That is also possible, which its difficult here with much of the story one sided, of that I add also.

She doesn't look overweight and as didge said, BMI isn't an accurate measure of a person.
You could have two people, same height, weighing ten stone: one is ten stone of fat, one is ten stone of muscle.

eddie wrote:She doesn't look overweight and as didge said, BMI isn't an accurate measure of a person.
You could have two people, same height, weighing ten stone: one is ten stone of fat, one is ten stone of muscle.

Yeah right - how likely is it that a girl that age will be pure muscle?

As I said, the range is very wide for these charts, so they do allow for that kind of thing anyway.

Anyway, the real issue here is the mother going to the press. She claims that her daughter is upset because the school said she was too fat - in confidence, and now she's just told the whole world. What is wrong with people?

eddie wrote:She doesn't look overweight and as didge said, BMI isn't an accurate measure of a person.
You could have two people, same height, weighing ten stone: one is ten stone of fat, one is ten stone of muscle.

Agreed Eddie, I can understand helping those who are what I would describe as overweight, but again tact has to be used with girls and boys of this age. They are not mentally prepared as of yet to fully understand all of this and it can have consequential effects. Again people need to take into account the age groups here and how best to deal with obesity. Sending home a letter is not what I would call pratical, but bring in parents with their children to discuss if theere might be a problem and how to deal with this. Being slightly overweight by a fixed BMI index is no big deal at that age as when she is in secondary she will be doing far more intense sports

Intense sports? Standing around on a hockey pitch doesn't really count.

Anyway, once she's a teenager, she won't need any letters about being overweight, she'll become obsessed about her weight all by herself. That's what girls are like.

I wonder about this woman's tone - she says the school was aware of what she does for a living. It's like she's saying - don't they know who I am?

Perhaps the girl secretly buys sweets when her mother's not looking.

Like I say Rags, the whole approach is wrong here with kids of that age, I would call in the parents if and only there was a real weight problem. In no way is she fat or obeses and at that age she should not be made to thinking she is fat. That to me is fundementally wrong.

It's the way of the world now: we have to be tested and poked and watched and injected and we all rollover and do as we are told.

Didge wrote:Like I say Rags, the whole approach is wrong here with kids of that age, I would call in the parents if and only there was a real weight problem. In no way is she fat or obeses and at that age she should not be made to thinking she is fat. That to me is fundementally wrong.

Her BMI says otherwise though. If her mother disagrees with the BMI charts, she should write to David Cameron or someone rather than go running to the press to tell the whole world that her daughter has been labelled as overweight. If her daughter was upset about the letter, she'll be a lot more upset now when her schoolmates mention the press article.

eddie wrote:It's the way of the world now: we have to be tested and poked and watched and injected and we all rollover and do as we are told.

I think you have been singing earlier this evening  

Hahahaha I actually started humming that after I posted that post!

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:Like I say Rags, the whole approach is wrong here with kids of that age, I would call in the parents if and only there was a real weight problem. In no way is she fat or obeses and at that age she should not be made to thinking she is fat. That to me is fundementally wrong.

Her BMI says otherwise though. If her mother disagrees with the BMI charts, she should write to David Cameron or someone rather than go running to the press to tell the whole world that her daughter has been labelled as overweight. If her daughter was upset about the letter, she'll be a lot more upset now when her schoolmates mention the press article.

Again its only a standard measure which is not wholly accurate and even more so for an 11 year old girl. The point you are missing Rags is, that in no way is she at a health risk with her weight at that age based on her picture. sorry I find it utterly silly to be saying to children of that age, unless they are clearly overweight. As to her classmates, they may well all be very much behind her, so to go off an assumption you have no idea about is silly really Rags

eddie wrote:Hahahaha I actually started humming that after I posted that post!

lol same here when I read your post

Didge wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Her BMI says otherwise though. If her mother disagrees with the BMI charts, she should write to David Cameron or someone rather than go running to the press to tell the whole world that her daughter has been labelled as overweight. If her daughter was upset about the letter, she'll be a lot more upset now when her schoolmates mention the press article.

Again its only a standard measure which is not wholly accurate and even more so for an 11 year old girl. The point you are missing Rags is, that in no way is she at a health risk with her weight at that age based on her picture. sorry I find it utterly silly to be saying to children of that age, unless they are clearly overweight. As to her classmates, they may well all be very much behind her, so to go off an assumption you have no idea about is silly really Rags

I don't know why you're discounting the BMI charts. This is what fat adults do - they say the charts must be wrong.

You can only see a little bit of her - you can't tell if she's fat or not. Are you really suggesting that her school mates won't take the piss out of her now?

This is really about her mother isn't it? She's taken umbrage because she considers herself an expert in such matters and thinks she knows better than anyone else.

Look, we could argue till the fat cows came home whether she's fat or not, but the issue is how the school dealt with it and how her mother subsequently dealt with it.
Her mother has made it very public thereby possibly embarrassing her daughter further!

eddie wrote:Look, we could argue till the fat cows came home whether she's fat or not, but the issue is how the school dealt with it and how her mother subsequently dealt with it.
Her mother has made it very public thereby possibly embarrassing her daughter further!

Hahahahaaaaa! Nice one.

I agree - this says more about her mother than anything else.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:


Again its only a standard measure which is not wholly accurate and even more so for an 11 year old girl. The point you are missing Rags is, that in no way is she at a health risk with her weight at that age based on her picture. sorry I find it utterly silly to be saying to children of that age, unless they are clearly overweight. As to her classmates, they may well all be very much behind her, so to go off an assumption you have no idea about is silly really Rags

I don't know why you're discounting the BMI charts. This is what fat adults do - they say the charts must be wrong.

You can only see a little bit of her - you can't tell if she's fat or not. Are you really suggesting that her school mates won't take the piss out of her now?

This is really about her mother isn't it? She's taken umbrage because she considers herself an expert in such matters and thinks she knows better than anyone else.

lol come on rags, she is not fat and we both know it.

I agree with Eddie the mother could have possible made things worse, but that is the age we live in today, but again at that age I think it is being handle poorly by the school, if going b y what the mother has said

Didge wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

I don't know why you're discounting the BMI charts. This is what fat adults do - they say the charts must be wrong.

You can only see a little bit of her - you can't tell if she's fat or not. Are you really suggesting that her school mates won't take the piss out of her now?

This is really about her mother isn't it? She's taken umbrage because she considers herself an expert in such matters and thinks she knows better than anyone else.

lol come on rags, she is not fat and we both know it.

I agree with Eddie the mother could have possible made things worse, but that is the age we live in today, but again at that age I think it is being handle poorly by the school, if going b y what the mother has said

Ask yourself why there isn't a whole photo of her then.

To be honest, I really don't understand the mentality of people these days. I mean, what about the girl herself? If someone had said to me when I was 11 - let's take a photo of you and put it in the national press because someone said you're fat - I'd say - I don't think so! What the hell is wrong with these people?

I can tell by the face and upper body she is not fat Rags
Sorry but your reasoning that everyone should think like tyou did at 11 shows how you fundementally do not understand how and why people are all different. You cannot expect everyone to think and do as you do Rags. Again  making out a girl of 11 who clearly is not fat is overweight is damaging mentally to someone of that age por at the very least very susceptible mentally to such a thing

A lot of pre-teen girls carry a little fat around this age due to puberty and menstruation starting.
I wouldn't worry at this age unless the child was obese.

eddie wrote:A lot of pre-teen girls carry a little fat around this age due to puberty and menstruation starting.
I wouldn't worry at this age unless the child was obese.

Exactly and hence why I think the letter and telling the girl is over the top

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:


lol come on rags, she is not fat and we both know it.

I agree with Eddie the mother could have possible made things worse, but that is the age we live in today, but again at that age I think it is being handle poorly by the school, if going b y what the mother has said

Ask yourself why there isn't a whole photo of her then.

To be honest, I really don't understand the mentality of people these days. I mean, what about the girl herself? If someone had said to me when I was 11 - let's take a photo of you and put it in the national press because someone said you're fat - I'd say - I don't think so! What the hell is wrong with these people?

There is a whole photo of her, the papers just cut it off:



And maybe, once she had got over her upset, the daughter was strong enough to say, blow this, let's warn other kids.  And as her mother is a fitness and nuturion adviser, I would image that her daughter eats well, exercies and probably has a high muscle mass that a lot of children.

Children also ten to grow out and then up in stages.  The whole thing is ludicrous.

sassy wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Ask yourself why there isn't a whole photo of her then.

To be honest, I really don't understand the mentality of people these days. I mean, what about the girl herself? If someone had said to me when I was 11 - let's take a photo of you and put it in the national press because someone said you're fat - I'd say - I don't think so! What the hell is wrong with these people?

There is a whole photo of her, the papers just cut it off:



And maybe, once she had got over her upset, the daughter was strong enough to say, blow this, let's warn other kids.  And as her mother is a fitness and nuturion adviser, I would image that her daughter eats well, exercies and probably has a high muscle mass that a lot of children.

Children also ten to grow out and then up in stages.  The whole thing is ludicrous.

I wouldn't imagine such a thing. Children often do the opposite of what their parents want them to do.

My real objection is the absurd attention seeking on the part of the mother. Talk about blowing your own trumpet and using your own daughter to do so.

But is the mother blowing this out of proportion, considering her daughter is in proportion and clearly not overweight. If her daughter stopped eating because they are telling healthy girls they are overweight, then the mother has a valid point.

She doesn't look fat here but she needs watching if she doesn't get any taller quite quickly.
She does have the look of someone who could put weight on and keep it on tbh.

But I wouldn't worry unless she got fatter or until she has her periods etc

Didge wrote:But is the mother blowing this out of proportion, considering her daughter is in proportion and clearly not overweight. If her daughter stopped eating because they are telling healthy girls they are overweight, then the mother has a valid point.

The point is that they didn't tell the girl that, they told the mother that, and now she's told everyone else.

eddie wrote:She doesn't look fat here but she needs watching if she doesn't get any taller quite quickly.
She does have the look of someone who could put weight on and keep it on tbh.

But I wouldn't worry unless she got fatter or until she has her periods etc

Isn't that why the school sent the letter - as a sort of advance warning? Her BMI showed that she was only a little bit over her ideal weight, but you know how that can escalate if you're not careful.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:But is the mother blowing this out of proportion, considering her daughter is in proportion and clearly not overweight. If her daughter stopped eating because they are telling healthy girls they are overweight, then the mother has a valid point.

The point is that they didn't tell the girl that, they told the mother that, and now she's told everyone else.

Most mothers and daughters if they have a decent relationship would discuss what the school said and what they were going to do about it.

Those legging things are awful! Don't wear them.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:But is the mother blowing this out of proportion, considering her daughter is in proportion and clearly not overweight. If her daughter stopped eating because they are telling healthy girls they are overweight, then the mother has a valid point.

The point is that they didn't tell the girl that, they told the mother that, and now she's told everyone else.

Yes but they sent a letter stating she was overweight. Even if the mother told her and was angry at the school its clear intention is to inform the child is overweight, no matter how you put a spin on this rags

sassy wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

The point is that they didn't tell the girl that, they told the mother that, and now she's told everyone else.

Most mothers and daughters if they have a decent relationship would discuss what the school said and what they were going to do about it.

That wouldn't normally include running to the press though would it?

Didge wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

The point is that they didn't tell the girl that, they told the mother that, and now she's told everyone else.

Yes but they sent a letter stating she was overweight. Even if the mother told her and was angry at the school its clear intention is to inform the child is overweight, no matter how you put a spin on this rags

Only very slightly overweight, which I can believe actually from the photo. They weren't saying she was a right porker or anything.

eddie wrote:A lot of pre-teen girls carry a little fat around this age due to puberty and menstruation starting.
I wouldn't worry at this age unless the child was obese.

Plus, if you look at the picture of the mother, although she is small, she has a very wide face, as does her daughter, which if looking at the facial features by themselves, would make you think that were fatter than they are.

Raggamuffin wrote:

sassy wrote:

Most mothers and daughters if they have a decent relationship would discuss what the school said and what they were going to do about it.

That wouldn't normally include running to the press though would it?

Why not if they thought they were helping other girls, would make the child feel empowered and in control.

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:


Yes but they sent a letter stating she was overweight. Even if the mother told her and was angry at the school its clear intention is to inform the child is overweight, no matter how you put a spin on this rags

Only very slightly overweight, which I can believe actually from the photo. They weren't saying she was a right porker or anything.

But the point is it mentally effected the child, which is no surprise being that her mother is a fitness instructor. This is the most telling point, where a child where the mother is very healthy clearly it will effect the mental health of the child where she clearly thinks then something is wrong with her, if as the mother states, even if eating healthily. This to me is what triggered her to stop eating

Didge wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Only very slightly overweight, which I can believe actually from the photo. They weren't saying she was a right porker or anything.

But the point is it mentally effected the child, which is no surprise being that her mother is a fitness instructor. This is the most telling point, where a child where the mother is very healthy clearly it will effect the mental health of the child where she clearly thinks then something is wrong with her, if as the mother states, even if eating healthily. This to me is what triggered her to stop eating

And you think that running to the press is going to help?

I think there's a fundamental problem these days with how much the Government and schools should intervene in this kind of thing. There seems to be two extremes going on - girls who develop eating disorders and anorexia, and girls who do become obese at a young age. That does of course apply to boys too, but the anorexia thing seems to be more common in girls.

Anyway, what is the right thing to do? We have the Government telling us the safe level of alcohol we should drink, the number of portions of fruit and vegetables we should eat, and now we have them telling schools they should log the weight of pupils in order to nip potential problems in the bud. If they didn't intervene, wouldn't some people say they should?

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:


But the point is it mentally effected the child, which is no surprise being that her mother is a fitness instructor. This is the most telling point, where a child where the mother is very healthy clearly it will effect the mental health of the child where she clearly thinks then something is wrong with her, if as the mother states, even if eating healthily. This to me is what triggered her to stop eating

And you think that running to the press is going to help?

I think there's a fundamental problem these days with how much the Government and schools should intervene in this kind of thing. There seems to be two extremes going on - girls who develop eating disorders and anorexia, and girls who do become obese at a young age. That does of course apply to boys too, but the anorexia thing seems to be more common in girls.

Anyway, what is the right thing to do? We have the Government telling us the safe level of alcohol we should drink, the number of portions of fruit and vegetables we should eat, and now we have them telling schools they should log the weight of pupils in order to nip potential problems in the bud. If they didn't intervene, wouldn't some people say they should?

What makes it all the more ludicrous is that this girl is at the time of her life when she NEEDS to eat more to have a healthy life:

During the rapid growth of puberty, the body has increased need for calories and key nutrients including protein, calcium, iron, folate and zinc. Iron and calcium are particularly important nutrients for your body during adolescence.

Iron helps your blood carry oxygen to all your muscles. It helps your brain function and helps your immune system fight disease. Menstruation increases a girl's need for iron. Choosing iron-rich food sources can help keep your body working optimally.

Your body will actually absorb more calcium from the foods you eat during puberty. The increased need for skeletal growth signals your body to "grab" all the calcium it can. The problem is most adolescents simply are not eating enough calcium-rich foods to meet their needs. If you do not meet your calcium needs during this critical time when your bones are growing, you may end up with weaker bones that are more prone to fractures.

Experts estimate that for every 5 percent increase in adolescent bone mass, there is a 40 percent decrease in the risk of bone fractures later in life. There is a limited time window to deposit calcium into bone. Bones grow and incorporate calcium rapidly during teen years. By the time you reach your early twenties, however, calcium is no longer added to bone. Worse yet, when you get a little older, you actually start losing calcium from your bones. Currently most teen girls are getting far less than the recommended 700 milligrams of calcium per day. So, reach for foods rich in calcium now.

http://www.nutrition.com.sg/he/heteens.asp