Are You An Emotional Empath?

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff’s New York Times Bestseller, “Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life” (Three Rivers Press, 2011)

Empaths are highly sensitive, finely tuned instruments when it comes to emotions. They feel everything, sometimes to an extreme, and are less apt to intellectualize feelings. Intuition is the filter through which they experience the world. Empaths are naturally giving, spiritually attuned, and good listeners. If you want heart, empaths have got it. Through thick and thin, they’re there for you, world-class nurturers.

The trademark of empaths is that they know where you’re coming from. Some can do this without taking on people’s feelings. However, for better or worse, others, like myself and many of my patients, can become angst-sucking sponges. This often overrides the sublime capacity to absorb positive emotions and all that is beautiful. If empaths are around peace and love, their bodies assimilate these and flourish. Negativity, though, often feels assaultive, exhausting. Thus, they’re particularly easy marks for emotional vampires, whose fear or rage can ravage empaths. As a subconscious defense, they may gain weight as a buffer. When thin, they’re more vulnerable to negativity, a missing cause of overeating explored in my book Positive Energy. Plus, an empath’s sensitivity can be overwhelming in romantic relationships; many stay single since they haven’t learned to negotiate their special cohabitation needs with a partner.

When empaths absorb the impact of stressful emotions, it can trigger panic attacks, depression, food, sex and drug binges, and a plethora of physical symptoms that defy traditional medical diagnosis from fatigue to agorophobia. Since I’m an empath, I want to help all my empath-patients cultivate this capacity and be comfortable with it.

Empathy doesn’t have to make you feel too much all the time. Now that I can center myself and refrain from shouldering civilization’s discontents, empathy continues to make me freer, igniting my compassion, vitality, and sense of the miraculous. To determine whether you’re an emotional empath, take the following quiz.

QUIZ: AM I AN EMPATH?

Ask yourself:

Have I been labeled as “too emotional” or overly sensitive? Yep
If a friend is distraught, do I start feeling it too? Yep
Are my feelings easily hurt? No
Am I emotionally drained by crowds, require time alone to revive? If I don't get regular time by myself, I can't stand it.
Do my nerves get frayed by noise, smells, or excessive talk? Sometimes
Do I prefer taking my own car places so that I can leave when I please? Well, taxis.
Do I overeat to cope with emotional stress? Sometimes
Am I afraid of becoming engulfed by intimate relationships? No

If you answer “yes” to 1-3 of these questions, you’re at least part empath. Responding “yes” to more than 3 indicates that you’ve found your emotional type.

Recognizing that you’re an empath is the first step in taking charge of your emotions instead of constantly drowning in them. Staying on top of empathy will improve your self-care and relationships.
Emotional Action Step. How To Find Balance

Practice these strategies to center yourself.

Allow quiet time to emotionally decompress. Get in the habit of taking calming mini-breaks throughout the day. Breathe in some fresh air. Stretch. Take a short walk around the office. These interludes will reduce the excessive stimulation of going non-stop.
Practice guerilla meditation. To counter emotional overload, act fast and meditate for a few minutes. This centers your energy so you don’t take it on from others.
Define and honor your empathic needs. Safeguard your sensitivities. Here’s how.
If someone asks too much of you, politely tell them “no.” It’s not necessary to explain why. As the saying goes, “No is a complete sentence.”
If your comfort level is three hours max for socializing--even if you adore the people--take your own car or have an alternate transportation plan so you’re not stranded.
If crowds are overwhelming, eat a high-protein meal beforehand (this grounds you) and sit in the far corner of, say, a theatre or party, not dead center.
If you feel nuked by perfume, nicely request that your friends refrain from wearing it around you. If you can’t avoid it, stand near a window or take frequent breaks to catch a breath of fresh air outdoors.
If you overeat to numb negative emotions, practice the guerilla meditation mentioned above, before you’re lured to the refrigerator, a potential vortex of temptation. As an emergency measure, keep a cushion by the fridge so you can be poised to meditate instead of binge.
Carve out private space at home. Then you won’t be stricken by the feeling of too much togetherness. (Chapter 8 discusses nontraditional living settings compatible with an empath’s comfort zone.)


How about anyone else.? For me, my absolute requirement is that I can spend time by myself every day preferably, to paint, meditate, read or just be quiet. Now I'm involved in local politics I plan my week so that I have that time. Peace and contemplation are as necessary to me as oxygen.

what did I tell you ?

You certainly did me darlin!

I think I'm one of those too
I don't overeat when stressed though, I don't eat at all!

I hate excessive smells - in fact smells can actually make me feel ill and noisy environments can irritate me beyond belief

All the rest I got the same as the op

There you go. Whenever we go out, nine times out of ten I leave OH nattering and drinking his pint after a couple of hours and come home to peace and dog. I like being sociable in short bursts lol.

I love being out and I'm very sociable, but I always have to have a section of the day when I have absolute peace and quiet.
I prefer to visit people rather than have them visit me....so I can get up and leave when I'm ready lol

Sounds like a plan!

I have always preferred my own company, can't stand crowds,the usual family meets for Wedding, Funerals and Birthdays see's me leaving after i'v "showed my face". That's why I loved Fishing and Shooting, out in the country on my own. Can't do it now, but how I miss it!

I like small crowds (under 100 people); places with thousands of people, like a sporting event, can overwhelm me a bit -- unless I'm there to work, for some reason. It's funny how psychologists come up with these categories, I think most people are sometimes in the mood for different situations at different times and really just trying to find a balance.