How should a parent handle a violent child?

by Syl Thu Mar 08, 2018 1:20 pm

Surely she could have done all this without dragging her little girl through the papers and social media.
Personally, I think most cases of violence against parents from young kids must be the fault of the parenting.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-5469269/Grandmother-believes-six-year-olds-violent-temper-tantrums.html

"A single mother desperate to get her violent six-year-old daughter under control was finally able to take charge thanks to the help of an expert child psychologist.

Lisa, 29, who lives with her parents in Oldbury, Birmingham, had struggled with daughter Demi's vicious outbursts, and would regularly be on the receiving end of kicks, slaps, punches and hair pulling at the hands of her angry child.
Lisa's mother Sharon, 57, had to constantly intervene to break the pair up - despite regularly being subjected to Demi's vicious temper herself.
At the end of their tether with Demi - who understood she had a 'naughty side' - Lisa sought help from Laverne Antrobus in Channel 5's Violent Child, Desperate Parents, who told the single mother she needed to have the confidence to be more firm with her little girl.

Laverne warned that Sharon's involvement was confusing for Demi, as there was no 'clear marked line' about who was in charge in the household. She advised Lisa to use negotiating techniques with her little girl, offering her alternatives when she has a tantrum, rather than further provoking her anger by saying 'no'. "

by eddie Thu Mar 08, 2018 4:03 pm

Okay....why would someone have to “intervene” between a grown adult and a six year old child? Just how strong is this child? Jeez. Rolling Eyes

The reason this child is the way she is? Because she’s been allowed to get her own way for years and because her Mum is stupid and so is her grandmother. Between them, they haven’t managed to take charge of a child.

What a pair of dimwits.

by Maddog Thu Mar 08, 2018 4:17 pm

by Syl Thu Mar 08, 2018 4:54 pm

eddie wrote:Okay....why would someone have to “intervene” between a grown adult and a six year old child? Just how strong is this child? Jeez.

The reason this child is the way she is? Because she’s been allowed to get her own way for years and because her Mum is stupid and so is her grandmother. Between them, they haven’t managed to take charge of a child.

What a pair of dimwits.

The saying goes... behind every successful man is a strong woman, well behind every child who acts like this kid does, is a useless parent...unless of course there is a medical reason.

Its the easiest thing in the world to give a child a choice, don't say "put your shoes on" say "which shoes do you want to wear today"....that usually works because the child is making her own decisions.

by Syl Thu Mar 08, 2018 4:57 pm

Maddog wrote:

Haha....well it works because I have a friend who regularly used to hurl her shoes at her 2 lads.....they grew up to be well mannered and bright, albeit a bit bruised. Razz

by eddie Thu Mar 08, 2018 5:33 pm

I hate it when parents hit their kids.

by HoratioTarr Thu Mar 08, 2018 8:00 pm

There are no bad kids. Only bad parents.

by Maddog Thu Mar 08, 2018 8:12 pm

Syl wrote:
Maddog wrote:

Haha....well it works because I have a friend who regularly used to hurl her shoes at her 2 lads.....they grew up to be well mannered and bright, albeit a bit bruised.

Hispanic kids do tend to be well behaved. They might be down to having more intact families with two parents, or maybe it's la chancla or el cincho. Wink

by Syl Thu Mar 08, 2018 9:40 pm

So my translation of la chancia is saying whack the child with a flipflop??

My friend didn't throw rubber flip flops, she used to take off her wooden Dr Scholes and hurl them at her two boys if they were playing up....I'm surprised they survived really.

by eddie Thu Mar 08, 2018 9:50 pm

HoratioTarr wrote:There are no bad kids. Only bad parents.

Apart from rare cases, I tend to agree with you.

by JulesV Thu Mar 08, 2018 10:25 pm

Mum behaved very responsibly in seeking professional help.
She should have protected the kids ID though.

by Syl Thu Mar 08, 2018 10:36 pm

eddie wrote:I hate it when parents hit their kids.

Its a generational thing, smacking isn't seen to be helpful now, a couple of generations ago it was the norm....and amazingly kids grew up to respect their parents and the society they lived in, probably a lot more than many do today.

Personally, I hate the way so many parents swear at their children, or bend down and scream in their faces....now to me, THAT is far worse than a tap on the bum or legs if the child is being naughty.

by Maddog Fri Mar 09, 2018 4:28 am

Syl wrote:So my translation of la chancia is saying whack the child with a flipflop??

My friend didn't throw rubber flip flops, she used to take off her wooden Dr Scholes and hurl them at her two boys if they were playing up....I'm surprised they survived really.

I think a sandle is the correct translation.

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