Bullying and teenage suicide

A news story this week in which the mother of a 17 years old boy writes a heartbreaking letter to bullies and their parents.
This story broke my heart.


Boy dubbed 'most hated person in school' by bullies stepped in front of train


A grieving mother has written a heartbreaking open letter to the bullies who drove her teenage son - regarded as "the most hated person in school" - to suicide .

Public schoolboy Felix Alexander, 17, suffered years of abuse at school and online before he stepped in front of a train.

In a letter explaining the torment her son suffered, his devastated mother Lucy said he first saw a psychologist at the age of 10 but the cruel treatment worsened as he got older.

He was once known as "the most hated" pupil at his school and, despite switching schools , the bullying continued until he could no longer cope.

Last April Felix told his parents he was getting the bus to school but instead went to the railway tracks.

He was killed instantly when he was struck by a train at Abbotswood Junction, Norton, near his home in Worcester.

An inquest concluded Felix had committed suicide after suffering years of bullying, firstly in the playground and then by online trolls.

One of the websites he was targeted on was Ask.fm, which has been linked to seven teenage suicides.

His years of torment began in 2009 following a playground argument about violent video game Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2.

The 18-rated game had just been released but Felix, then aged ten, was branded a "p****" by classmates at posh King's School in Worcester after he admitted his parents had banned him from playing it.

The historic £13,000-a-year independent school - whose past pupils include TV presenter Chris Tarrant - caters for 1,460 pupils aged 2-18.

Felix eventually moved to Pershore High School last September but the bullying continued until he took his own life.

In her letter, mother-of-three Lucy, 51, wrote to her son's bullies, as well as to schools and parents.

She wrote: "His confidence and self-esteem had been eroded over a long period of time by the bullying behaviour he experienced in secondary education.

"It began with unkindness and social isolation and over the years, with the advent of social media, it became cruel and overwhelming.

"People who had never even met Felix were abusing him. He was however so badly damaged by the abuse, isolation and unkindness he had experienced, that he was unable to see just how many people truly cared for him."

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/boy-dubbed-most-hated-person-8982884
Pictures on link and video



This is so awful. What has happened to some teenagers to think that bullying is ok? To continually bully someone throughout their whole school life is just despicable! I'm wondering how this expensive school that he went to, didn't tackle this at the very beginning?
What a lovely looking boy. His mum will never ever recover.

I hope he has found peace now.

The letter in full:

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/letter-break-your-heart-every-8985927

I read this story this morning and like you I found it heart breaking.
It's too late for this boy, by the time he changed school the damage was done, he couldn't forget all the abuse which no doubt made him feel worthless.

Bullying in schools still goes on and I believe many teachers ignore it and deny it happens instead of getting to the root of who and why.
When bullying carries on via the internet some kids have no safe haven at all.
Every child should feel protected at home, but they're not because they have no peace. I believe the internet has encouraged bullies, because bullies are cowards and it's easy for them for target others hid behind their computers and phones.

Oh definitely Syl. The internet has allowed in a dark undercurrent of human life, people who want to make other's miserable, envious, miserable people who aren't happy until they're making others miserable. A part of me wonders if the bullies' parents, have an inkling about what kind of people their children are.
I'm sure I'd know if my kid was secretly rotten.

I have just lost a long post before I could send it.

I think some parents don't know don't care, other kids are very crafty and are the last ones you would expect of bullying, others just go with the flow hoping if they join in it'll keep them from becoming a target.

Being continuously called the 'most hated person in school' is cruel and nasty, add this to all the other stuff that happened to him it's not suprising he felt unable to cope.

You know....we see this sort of behaviour on some forums, aimed at adults by adults, I know people who have left forums altogether after letting this get to them, if some adults can bully online to the point of driving other adults away, it's not suprising young vulnerable kids cant handle it.

Some kids could be called "Fairy" at School, and once it starts it sticks.

Syl wrote:I have just lost a long post before I could send it.

I think some parents don't know don't care, other kids are very crafty and are the last ones you would expect of bullying, others just go with the flow hoping if they join in it'll keep them from becoming a target.

Being continuously called the 'most hated person in school' is cruel and nasty, add this to all the other stuff that happened to him it's not suprising he felt unable to cope.

You know....we see this sort of behaviour on some forums, aimed at adults by adults, I know people who have left forums altogether after letting this get to them, if some adults can bully online to the point of driving other adults away, it's not suprising young vulnerable kids cant handle it.

Online bullies are just the worst IMO. They attack because they feel as if they cannot be found so they're the worst cowards of the lot.

Parents think that once a child is a teen, they don't need to bother so much and i think the opposite is true, we need to keep a close eye on them (from a safe distance!)

Yes you are right....like someone said in an article today, you wouldn't let a young person spend hours every day wandering around unsupervised in the real world, so why think it's OK in the cyber world.

I also think there are a lot more dangerous people online than you will ever likely meet with in person.

Disgraceful behaviour, and some people think that teenagers are "innocent".

Raggamuffin wrote:Disgraceful behaviour, and some people think that teenagers are "innocent".

A lot of them are. A lot of them are horrible. Even more of them are both!

nicko wrote:Some kids could be called "Fairy" at School,   and once it starts it sticks.

Which is exactly why bullies should be punished severely and lessons taught on the subject to prevent it.

I feel for this boy, to take his life because of bullying is heartbreaking. He was so desperate.

Schools do address bullying but it doesn't go far enough imo. Also the internet makes it a magnate for nasty trolls to add their bit, when they can hide behind a computer and make the persons life a misery or if they know them in real life, they cant escape it!

Many have been desperate enough to take their lives, such a waste of a young boys life, and oh how sad for his family.

He was a good looking lad, and perhaps some of the bullying was down to jealousy, who knows. Sometimes, a person gets picked on because they are just perceived to be different or 'soft'. It's dreadful state of affairs, but how many of us stood and watched as youngsters ourselves as kids got picked on at school. I really do think it's about time there was something in the curriculum that involved teaching children from a very young age about self awareness and compassion.

Bullies should be dealt with effectively and punished, but they should also find out why they are doing the bullying, because sometimes they do it because they are being bullied themselves and want to fit in.   I agree with you HT about how children should be taught.   Have to say, I didn't walk away from others who were being bullied at school and got into a lot of trouble myself because of it.  My Nan and Grandad taught me to stand up and be counted when bullying was going on bless 'em.

I've never been bullied myself, in real life, but like you sass, I have spent lots of time defending people who have.

sassy wrote:Bullies should be dealt with effectively and punished, but they should also find out why they are doing the bullying, because sometimes they do it because they are being bullied themselves and want to fit in.   I agree with you HT about how children should be taught.   Have to say, I didn't walk away from others who were being bullied at school and got into a lot of trouble myself because of it.  My Nan and Grandad taught me to stand up and be counted when bullying was going on bless 'em.

I went to an all girls' school and there was always someone getting picked on, the fights mostly involved rolling around on the floor pulling each others' hair or windmilling your arms hoping to get a swipe in, but these days it can involve knives and worse.   Just surviving in school in trying not to get bullied could take all your energy and cunning.

eddie wrote:I've never been bullied myself, in real life, but like you sass, I have spent lots of time defending people who have.

I've done it a few times, both as a kid and an adult, and nearly always to my own detriment.

HoratioTarr wrote:

eddie wrote:I've never been bullied myself, in real life, but like you sass, I have spent lots of time defending people who have.

I've done it a few times, both as a kid and an adult, and nearly always to my own detriment.  

Yeah some things bite you in the arse.

HoratioTarr wrote:He was a good looking lad, and perhaps some of the bullying was down to jealousy, who knows.   Sometimes, a person gets picked on because they are just perceived to be different or 'soft'.   It's dreadful state of affairs, but how many of us stood and watched as youngsters ourselves as kids got picked on at school.   I really do think it's about time there was something in the curriculum that involved teaching children from a very young age about self awareness and compassion.

I can honestly say I never watched a kid be bullied when I was at school.
Only one girl that I knew used to be bullied, I remember her name and where she lived, and I would walk home with her whilst other kids shouted names at her and ask me why I was walking with her....I ignored them.
The reason she was bullied was she was overweight, one of the few back then when obesity wasn't the same problem it is now.

I despise bullies and always have.

sassy wrote:Bullies should be dealt with effectively and punished, but they should also find out why they are doing the bullying, because sometimes they do it because they are being bullied themselves and want to fit in.   I agree with you HT about how children should be taught.   Have to say, I didn't walk away from others who were being bullied at school and got into a lot of trouble myself because of it.  My Nan and Grandad taught me to stand up and be counted when bullying was going on bless 'em.

Have a ....I agree with you 100%.

Syl wrote:

HoratioTarr wrote:He was a good looking lad, and perhaps some of the bullying was down to jealousy, who knows.   Sometimes, a person gets picked on because they are just perceived to be different or 'soft'.   It's dreadful state of affairs, but how many of us stood and watched as youngsters ourselves as kids got picked on at school.   I really do think it's about time there was something in the curriculum that involved teaching children from a very young age about self awareness and compassion.

I can honestly say I never watched a kid be bullied when I was at school.
Only one girl that I knew used to be bullied, I remember her name and where she lived, and I would walk home with her whilst other kids shouted names at her and ask me why I was walking with her....I ignored them.
The reason she was bullied was she was overweight, one of the few back then when obesity wasn't the same problem it is now.

I despise bullies and always have.

I bet she really appreciated you, even now.

eddie wrote:

Syl wrote:

I can honestly say I never watched a kid be bullied when I was at school.
Only one girl that I knew used to be bullied, I remember her name and where she lived, and I would walk home with her whilst other kids shouted names at her and ask me why I was walking with her....I ignored them.
The reason she was bullied was she was overweight, one of the few back then when obesity wasn't the same problem it is now.

I despise bullies and always have.

I bet she really appreciated you, even now.

I hope she grew up to be a stunner......I always think when kids are bullied for their looks or their weight that would be the best revenge of all.

When I was abot 12 or 13 , I saved a girl in our class from the leering and groping antics of the class bully by decking him. He ran off with a busted nose whic made him uglier than ever and caused a lot of mirth as everyone hated him.
I got my reward at the school disco with some slow dances with my rescued damsel and some lip action afterwards.We became good friends and for a while more than that, commuted together to the smoke as late teenagers, and are still friends on social media. All of that 48 years ago.

Handy Andy wrote:When I was abot 12 or 13 , I saved a girl in our class from the leering and groping antics of the class bully by decking him. He ran off with a busted nose whic made him uflier than ever and caused a lot of mirth as everyone hated him.
I got my reward at the school disco with some slow dances with my rescued damsel and some lip action afterwards.We became good friends and for a while more than that, commuted together to the smoke as late teenagers, and are still friends on social media. All of that 48 years ago.

Well done you.
I thought for one magical moment you were going to say that you and she married and live happily ever after.

Syl wrote:

Handy Andy wrote:When I was abot 12 or 13 , I saved a girl in our class from the leering and groping antics of the class bully by decking him. He ran off with a busted nose whic made him uflier than ever and caused a lot of mirth as everyone hated him.
I got my reward at the school disco with some slow dances with my rescued damsel and some lip action afterwards.We became good friends and for a while more than that, commuted together to the smoke as late teenagers, and are still friends on social media. All of that 48 years ago.

Well done you.
I thought for one magical moment you were going to say that you and she married and live happily ever after.

We stopped seeing each other after her parents came home unexpectedly whilst we were "having lust action"  We chuckle about it now, but it must have been quite a sight!
Nearly made a mess on the leather sofa too.

Ah. That would've been a lovely romantic story. Still, you gained a good friend from it.

You must have been about 12 when you were having it off on the sofa,

Started young didn't you?