A Culture of Narcissism, Part II: Cyberbullying and Trolling

For this post in the series, I’ll be exploring how technologies like the internet provide narcissists and those who have antisocial traits with easy access to victims and minimal effort. Cyberbullying and trolling are strategic ways for narcissists who lack adequate narcissistic supply or who are experiencing boredom to get a quick “fix” without being held accountable for their abuse.



In the context of intimate relationships, survivors of narcissistic abuse may be stalked, harassed and cyberbullied for years even after the ending of the relationship, especially if they were the ones to discard the narcissist first. When a narcissist suffers from a narcissistic injury, this can lead to narcissistic rage. This rage is a result of  an injury to their ego when something or someone threatens their delusions of grandeur and “false self.” Since survivors often implement No Contact with their abusers, narcissistic abusers feel a loss of power and attempt to regain that power through tactics like provocation, hoovering and post-breakup triangulation techniques.

On a larger scale, narcissists and those who have antisocial traits employ similar manipulation tactics in cyberspace to provoke and harm complete strangers. A recent study showed that online trolls demonstrated high degrees of sadism, psychopathy and Machiavellianism. This should come to no surprise to anyone who has encountered trolls or cyberbullies – they are notorious for attempting to provoke people in order to derive sick feelings of satisfaction that they apparently can’t get anywhere else.

Bullying in any form, especially anonymous bullying, can lead to devastating results. Research indicates that cyberbullying in schools leads to a higher rate of suicidal ideation and suicide attempts in victims of cyberbullying. There have been a number of suicides that were triggered by the words of anonymous sadists – the suicides of many teenagers, for example, were a direct result of cyberbullying.

Cyberbullying and trolling leave such a terrible psychological impact that there is even a movement against anonymous comments sections on media outlets. Since there is little accountability for cyberbullies and the laws against it in each state may not protect victims entirely from emotional abuse, it often goes unchecked and unpunished. If cyberbullies are ever reprimanded, it is usually after the fact of a tragic suicide or in the event of publicity.


THREE WAYS TO DISTINGUISH A SADISTIC CYBERBULLY FROM A PERSON WHO’S PROVIDING CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM


1. Rather than engaging in healthy debate and respectful disagreement, cyberbullies and trolls distinguish themselves from normal people who disagree by staging personal attacks on character instead of providing evidence against the argument that they claim to have problems with. Instead of saying, “Research proves you wrong, here’s the source,” they’re more prone to verbal diarrhea which consists of insults, name-calling, word salad, circular logic and provocative overgeneralizations deliberately aimed to get a rise out of you. They may even bring up personal details or assume things about you that have nothing at all to do with the matter at hand. They are, like many narcissists in intimate relationships, perpetual boundary-breakers.

2. They persist. Some cyberbullies give up eventually if they don’t get the response they were looking for, but others will keep hunting for more of a reaction and provoking you, even on multiple accounts. Like narcissists in intimate relationships, they use the anonymity feature of cyberspace to employ triangulation techniques with their “fake” accounts to show “support” for – who else -themselves.

3.  Stalking. When you do respond in a way they’re not accustomed to, they suffer a kind of narcissistic injury and resort to low blows and attacks. Some cyberbullies are satisfied when you give them a quick ego stroke, like a “You’re right” to their insult and go away. Others are much more malicious. When you give them radio silence or choose to report their harassing behavior, they come after you.


THREE WAYS TO HANDLE CYBERBULLIES AND TROLLS


1. Don’t engage or feed the trolls. Depending on the forum or website that you’re being harassed on, there may be an option for you to report harassment or block the person. This is especially useful for cyberbullies who are attacking you personally and taking a toll on your mental health. This is sort of like going No Contact – except, instead of someone you were in an intimate relationship with, you’re going NC on a stranger out to harm you. Find a way to remove them from your presence with the least amount of effort. They’re simply not worth the time and energy that it takes to stage a rebuttal. Remember: narcissists always need an audience and a source of supply. By removing yourself as a narcissistic source of supply, you refuse to give them the attention they’re looking for. By default, you win.

2. Be strategic about your privacy. Different forums and websites have different policies, so be strategic depending on what platform you’re using. Most social media platforms allow you to block or report anyone who’s harassing you, so take advantage of whatever you can do.

https://selfcarehaven.wordpress.com/2014/08/20/a-culture-of-narcissism-part-ii-cyberbullying-and-trolling/

sassy wrote:Telling you how to protect yourself is sinister?  I find that rather strange.

Raggamuffin wrote:I feel that this forum has taken a rather sinister turn today.

sassy wrote:Is was?  And there was me helping people to protect themselves.

sassy wrote:Is it?  Perhaps it's on our minds for some strange reason, who knows what put it ther.

Raggamuffin wrote:I'm not sure what a "culture of narcissism" has to do with cyberbullying and trolling.

Didge wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:I'm not sure what a "culture of narcissism" has to do with cyberbullying and trolling.

Rags, I appreciate what you are doing, but its only giving them a platform for as you rightly say above they are poorly trying to do, which is of little concern to me, that they are. If this is off me being annoyed several days ago after sassy kept dragging up the past about me to another poster where I made a threat which I said more off being annoyed and stated I would not do. To then have them make the most feeble attempt to attack me in the most childish manner.

Then let them, as its only showing them up for who they really are.

I have stated I am moving on, if they want to be left behind, that is their choice not mine.

Didge wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:I feel that this forum has taken a rather sinister turn today.

I would not worry they fail to see by their actions their are ticking all the boxes from what subjectively a narcissist has, which is a massive own goal

Like I say when someone has a hate that supersedes someone being sexist and homophobic and then applauds them clearly is psychologically a concern and a poor inability to move on.

So let them carry on as thy are.

I am not going to waste another moment over their immaturity

Raggamuffin wrote:

Didge wrote:


Rags, I appreciate what you are doing, but its only giving them a platform for as you rightly say above they are poorly trying to do, which is of little concern to me, that they are. If this is off me being annoyed several days ago after sassy kept dragging up the past about me to another poster where I made a threat which I said more off being annoyed and stated I would not do. To then have them make the most feeble attempt to attack me in the most childish manner.

Then let them, as its only showing them up for who they really are.

I have stated I am moving on, if they want to be left behind, that is their choice not mine.

Well I was hoping to expand the subject - like I tried to do in the locked thread. As I said, I think that lack of confidence can be mistaken for a "narcissistic personality". After all, they do say that bullies often lack confidence, and they try to cover that up by bullying others.

Raggamuffin wrote:

sassy wrote:Is it?  Perhaps it's on our minds for some strange reason, who knows what put it ther.

Then it's quite strange that it popped into both your minds several days after the reference to nervous breakdowns.

korban dallas wrote:

Didge wrote:


I would not worry they fail to see by their actions their are ticking all the boxes from what subjectively a narcissist has, which is a massive own goal

Like I say when someone has a hate that supersedes someone being sexist and homophobic and then applauds them clearly is psychologically a concern and a poor inability to move on.

So let them carry on as thy are.

I am not going to waste another moment over their immaturity

Oh dear so you can go around calling people racist homophobic, immature ,childish ect ect
But dare to imply anything about  you, anything ,and out comes the tissues and crocodile tears
The hypocrisy fairly reeks from you  

korban dallas wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Then it's quite strange that it popped into both your minds several days after the reference to nervous breakdowns.

your assuming her post wasn`t prompted because of mine ,certainly they was no conclusion  and reference to nervous breakdown has gone over my head as i do not know of what you speak  

sassy wrote:

korban dallas wrote:
Oh dear so you can go around calling people racist homophobic, immature ,childish ect ect
But dare to imply anything about  you, anything ,and out comes the tissues and crocodile tears
The hypocrisy fairly reeks from you  

Didge thought it was about him?  And there is me thinking is is about bullying narcissists and their manipulation and abuse!  It appears he relates to that.

Raggamuffin wrote:

korban dallas wrote:
your assuming her post wasn`t prompted because of mine ,certainly they was no conclusion  and reference to nervous breakdown has gone over my head as i do not know of what you speak  

Sassy hasn't said that your post prompted it all to pop into her head though has she?

Raggamuffin wrote:

korban dallas wrote:
your assuming her post wasn`t prompted because of mine ,certainly they was no conclusion  and reference to nervous breakdown has gone over my head as i do not know of what you speak  

Sassy hasn't said that your post prompted it all to pop into her head though has she?

korban dallas wrote:

Raggamuffin wrote:

Sassy hasn't said that your post prompted it all to pop into her head though has she?

did you ask ?

Raggamuffin wrote:

korban dallas wrote:
did you ask ?

I gave her the opportunity to say so, yes.

Raggamuffin wrote:

korban dallas wrote:
did you ask ?

I gave her the opportunity to say so, yes.