Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

by Guest Wed Sep 02, 2015 6:32 am

Earlier this week, people following the US Republican primary were shocked to see Donald Trump faced with a question he couldn't answer - his favourite bit of the Bible. It's fairly important for a Republican presidential candidate to be a big Bible fan, so it was a huge deal when he seemingly zig-zagged around the question and wouldn't even say if he favoured the Old or the New Testament.
This all prompted Twitter users to imagine what it would be like if the self-absorbed presidential hopeful wrote his own Bible.

"Can anything good come out of Nazareth? I mean, I'm sure some of them are good people and all. But mostly we get their worst." #TrumpBible
— Rachel Held Evans (@rachelheldevans) August 27, 2015

There was no room at the inn. Mary and Joseph should have gone to a Trump resort. Classy. Myrrh like you can't imagine. #TrumpBible
— Jeff Fecke (@jkfecke) August 26, 2015

"I'm not saying Jesus wasn't born in Bethlehem. I'm just saying show me the birth certificate." #trumpbible
— Leon Jacobs (@leonjacobs) August 27, 2015

God took 6 days to create the universe & then took a day of rest? Lazy. Inefficient. I pay a guy $3 and he builds me a universe. #TrumpBible
— Ryan Barrell (@RyanBarrell) August 29, 2015

I love God. He's a builder. Made the world in 6 days. That's YUUUUUUUGE. I would have used more marble. But He did a nice job. #TrumpBible
— Donald J. Drumpf (@RealDonalDrumpf) August 27, 2015

Scribe: Which is the greatest commandment?
Jesus: Sit down. Nobody called on you. Go back to Jerusalem.
#TrumpBible
— Brian Zahnd (@BrianZahnd) August 27, 2015

"Jesus? Nice guy, but LOW, LOW energy, I mean, bleeding out of his hands, his feet, his wherever..." #TrumpBible
— Christopher Heuertz (@ChrisHeuertz) August 29, 2015

" and Mary? No disrespect but she's pregnant, a teenager, unmarried. I mean she’s basically a disaster.” #Trumpbible
— Laura McAfee (@LauraMcAfee1) August 29, 2015

Don't get me wrong: Jesus? Great guy, classy. But a terrible executive. I would never tolerate a traitor within my organization. #TrumpBible
— Jeff B@AoSHQDD (@EsotericCD) August 27, 2015

He gets himself crucified, and we're to call him Savior! He's a loser; couldn't save himself! I like guys that weren't crucified.#TrumpBible
— TheCultOfRay (@EduExpIntel) August 29, 2015

And Moses went to Pharaoh and said to him, "Let my people go!" and Pharaoh did because Moses knew how to negotiate. #TrumpBible
— Ben Casselman (@bencasselman) August 26, 2015

Great flood, total disaster. Totally mismanaged by Noah, not a smart guy, total loser, couldn't even save the dinosaurs. #TrumpBible
— Trump Bible (@TheTrumpBible) August 28, 2015

God? Good guy. But he just wipes out all humans with a flood? Irresponsible way of handling assets, believe me. #TrumpBible @trumpbible
— Trump Bible (@trumpbible) August 28, 2015

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2015/08/29/trumpbible-donald-trump-bible-quotes_n_8059018.html?utm_hp_ref=uk-comedy&ir=UK+Comedy

by Original Quill Wed Sep 02, 2015 8:07 pm

Great!

by Ben Reilly Wed Sep 02, 2015 9:25 pm

Awesome!

"Joseph should not take back Mary. She cheated on him like a dog, got knocked up & will do it again--just watch. He can do much better!"

by veya_victaous Thu Sep 03, 2015 1:02 am

by Guest Thu Sep 03, 2015 6:17 am

Ben_Reilly wrote:Awesome!

"Joseph should not take back Mary. She cheated on him like a dog, got knocked up & will do it again--just watch. He can do much better!"

They were hilarious and well thought out and so on the money on how he would no doubt say such daft things.

Laughing

by Guest Thu Sep 03, 2015 7:52 am

I would love to get a pair of trimmers on that hair of his Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read Hair_c10

Hasn't anyone told him how daft he looks????

by Guest Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:07 am

feelthelove wrote:I would love to get a pair of trimmers on that hair of his

Hasn't anyone told him how daft he looks????

lol depends what kind of haircult you would give him FTL.

Can we have some mock hair shots please for a laugh?

lol!

by Original Quill Thu Sep 03, 2015 5:47 pm

He has been mocked for years for his hair. He now incorporates his comb-over into his political speech. He grabs it in his hand, tugs and says, "See, it's real!!"

Hair extensions aside, it's amazing to what lengths men will go to maintain they still have hair. Haha...almost like erections.

by Guest Thu Sep 03, 2015 7:44 pm

Original Quill wrote:He has been mocked for years for his hair. He now incorporates his comb-over into his political speech. He grabs it in his hand, tugs and says, "See, it's real!!"

Hair extensions aside, it's amazing to what lengths men will go to maintain they still have hair. Haha...almost like erections.

Pathetic, women would much rather have a real man than one with a comb over. Aren't bald men suppose to be more virile anyway????! Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read Ashame12

Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read Ashame12

by Original Quill Thu Sep 03, 2015 7:50 pm

feelthelove wrote:
Original Quill wrote:He has been mocked for years for his hair. He now incorporates his comb-over into his political speech. He grabs it in his hand, tugs and says, "See, it's real!!"

Hair extensions aside, it's amazing to what lengths men will go to maintain they still have hair. Haha...almost like erections.

Pathetic, women would much rather have a real man than one with a comb over. Aren't bald men suppose to be more virile anyway????!

Donno, but such a fastidious concern does suggest a weak character. It indicates that he fears revealing himself.

by Guest Thu Sep 03, 2015 7:59 pm

Original Quill wrote:
feelthelove wrote:

Pathetic, women would much rather have a real man than one with a comb over. Aren't bald men suppose to be more virile anyway????!

Donno, but such a fastidious concern does suggest a weak character. It indicates that he fears revealing himself.

I don't understand it, he looks terrible. If you're bald be bald, true love doesn't depend on appearance. I 100% think it's chemistry, looks fade, chemistry doesn't. Intelligent conversation doesn't, respect doesn't I love you

by Raggamuffin Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:32 pm

feelthelove wrote:
Original Quill wrote:

Donno, but such a fastidious concern does suggest a weak character. It indicates that he fears revealing himself.

I don't understand it, he looks terrible. If you're bald be bald, true love doesn't depend on appearance. I 100% think it's chemistry, looks fade, chemistry doesn't. Intelligent conversation doesn't, respect doesn't

He can have his hair how he wants it. You wouldn't like it if a woman was criticised for how she had her hair would you?

by Original Quill Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:57 pm

Raggamuffin wrote:
feelthelove wrote:

I don't understand it, he looks terrible. If you're bald be bald, true love doesn't depend on appearance. I 100% think it's chemistry, looks fade, chemistry doesn't. Intelligent conversation doesn't, respect doesn't

He can have his hair how he wants it. You wouldn't like it if a woman was criticised for how she had her hair would you?

I'll hand her off to you FTL. Sorry, but I have a transit meeting to go to.

xxx Q

by Raggamuffin Thu Sep 03, 2015 9:03 pm

Original Quill wrote:
Raggamuffin wrote:

He can have his hair how he wants it. You wouldn't like it if a woman was criticised for how she had her hair would you?

I'll hand her off to you FTL. Sorry, but I have a transit meeting to go to.

xxx Q

Sure you do. You just don't want to get into a row about my parents and your parents.

Twat.

by Ben Reilly Fri Sep 04, 2015 12:21 am

Raggamuffin wrote:
Original Quill wrote:
Raggamuffin wrote:

He can have his hair how he wants it. You wouldn't like it if a woman was criticised for how she had her hair would you?

I'll hand her off to you FTL. Sorry, but I have a transit meeting to go to.

xxx Q

Sure you do. You just don't want to get into a row about my parents and your parents.

Twat.

What would be so wrong about criticizing a woman who had ridiculous hair?

by Original Quill Fri Sep 04, 2015 6:00 pm

Raggamuffin wrote:
Original Quill wrote:

I'll hand her off to you FTL. Sorry, but I have a transit meeting to go to.

xxx Q

Sure you do. You just don't want to get into a row about my parents and your parents.

Twat.

That discussion seems to be solely your concern. I'll leave you to it. Have fun. Smile

by veya_victaous Thu Sep 24, 2015 5:31 am

by veya_victaous Thu Sep 24, 2015 5:31 am

by Lurker Sat Sep 26, 2015 4:37 am

by eddie Sat Sep 26, 2015 10:34 am

My sons friend was over for dinner with us about a week or so ago, and he'd been in America for about four weeks over the summer (his dad is American and he obviously has family over there)

Anyway, he said he heard about about Trump whilst there, and a lot of what he heard was quite favourable.
He said he didn't personally like him but he seemed to be pretty popular.

He's 15, so not sure what or where he heard stuff, but he's an intelligent kid.
Even my son knows of him and joined in the discussion!

Amazing what 15 year olds know these days! I was quite proud to be in the company of two intelligent young men!

by Lurker Sat Sep 26, 2015 7:11 pm

The only thing that attracts women to Trump are his millions of dollars.

by veya_victaous Mon Sep 28, 2015 12:00 am

by veya_victaous Mon Sep 28, 2015 4:51 am

by veya_victaous Wed Sep 30, 2015 3:08 am

by eddie Wed Sep 30, 2015 7:15 am

veya_victaous wrote:

Is that The Simpsons?

There are a lot of episodes where they've predicted future events, strangely.

by veya_victaous Mon Oct 19, 2015 12:15 am

Money makes money no matter how dumb you are, you just make less than you could have like Trump Would have been better off being a professional finger painter than Businessman, he should have left running business to experts and he would have twice as much OR he has lost half his father's money over his life time.

Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read O8kVAlv

Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read O8kVAlv

by Original Quill Mon Oct 19, 2015 3:35 am

veya_victaous wrote:Money makes money no matter how dumb you are, you just make less than you could have like Trump Would have been better off being a professional finger painter than Businessman, he should have left running business to experts and he would have twice as much OR he has lost half his father's money over his life time.

That's why I have to laugh when people mouth the old conservative ideas:

Quotes wrote:The three great essentials to achieve anything worth while are: Hard work, Stick-to-itiveness, and Common sense. --Thomas A. Edison

We all know that inheritance is the key to wealth and success.

by Sponsored content

Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read

Re: Donald Trump's Bible Would Be A Terrible Read