For Gels: continuing conversation about honesty...

I’ve taken part of our conversation on the other thread to continue it here:

eddie wrote:
Gels, I think, like me, you have an honesty that’s just quite different to most people.

Gelico wrote:
maybe, but don't you find that if you open up to folk and are genuinely honest, it seems to relax them it they too go beyond the surface and open up right back.


Yes! I have witnessed this in so many people throughout my life! People seem to be bored with casual conversation, platitudes, politeness and general bullshit. I’ve never been able to stay quiet...I don’t fit in like most people. I push boundaries with people and honestly, I haven’t run into any problems, which shows me, time and again, that people are hungry for something other than the norm, other than plastic words.

eddie wrote:I’ve taken part of our conversation on the other thread to continue it here:

eddie wrote:
Gels, I think, like me, you have an honesty that’s just quite different to most people.  

Gelico wrote:
maybe, but don't you find that if you open up to folk and are genuinely honest, it seems to relax them it they too go beyond the surface and open up right back.


Yes! I have witnessed this in so many people throughout my life! People seem to be bored with casual conversation, platitudes, politeness and general bullshit. I’ve never been able to stay quiet...I don’t fit in like most people. I push boundaries with people and honestly, I haven’t run into any problems, which shows me, time and again, that people are hungry for something other than the norm, other than plastic words.

yes, totally.  i remember well such a convo with a big black woman who got on the bus and sat next to me.  she was well overweight and sweating and wheezing and huffing and puffing and as she sat down she kind of knocked into me and then turned and was shaking her hand at me while wheezing until after a couple of seconds she said sorry about that.  i replied that it was fine and asked if she was ok.  i dont know if i send out vibes that invite confidences but just asking her if she was ok set her right off.  she said ''no, i'm not, i've been dieting for a couple of months and i've lost a stone but i've got so far to go and i'm right sick of people telling me i look great and that i'm fine when i know fine well i look like a sweating hippo'' .  from shop assistants to friends to her own family.  she said i need someone to remind me when i'm tempted by takeaways that i'm meant to be moving away from the hippo image but no one does.

she was really self deprecating and had one of those big momma infectious laughs.  i was able to laugh along with her but at the same time i was speaking to her of a friend of mine who has always been overweight and has been plagued by knee problems back problems sleeping problems etc etc and assured her she was dong the right thing just for the sake of her health, i then added ''and that's got nothing to do with your hippo image''.  i was able to do that without her being offended

suggested she have a good talk to those in her life and say what she needs from them

she had a beautiful soul and was a joy to journey with and i told her so

anyhoos going to sleep now

That is EXACTLY what she needed and if she was offended? Then don’t ask..., don’t invite your opinion, right?

I would have reacted the same way but with different words...same meaning though.

I know that you get it. And that’s all that matters.

It’s not that you think your way is necessarily right, like I don’t think mine is...but just don’t preach at me that your way is better, unless you have a really good reason..right?

And to me, unless your reason suggests that being honest is wrong, then I’m not interested.

How is honesty, ever wrong?  

Ever?

Ever?