For all ye dirty farting minks!!....

Irn Bru wrote:Ode to a Fart..by Robert Burns

Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie
lurks in yer belly efter a feastie
Nae matter whit yi try an dae
Abody`s gonnae hiv tae pay
Even if you try to stifle
Its like a bullet oot a rifle
Haud yer bum tight to the chair
to try an stop the leakin air
Shoogle yersel fae cheek to cheek
An pray tae god it disnae leak
Oot it comes like a clap o` thunder
Ricochets aroon the room michty me like a sonic boom
God aw michty it fairly reeks,hope I huvnae shit ma breeks!!!

Just let rip JD

victorisnotamused wrote:yup... ::D:: then given a disgusted look at the guy next to you ...he he

Joy Division wrote:

Irn Bru wrote:Ode to a Fart..by Robert Burns

Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie
lurks in yer belly efter a feastie
Nae matter whit yi try an dae
Abody`s gonnae hiv tae pay
Even if you try to stifle
Its like a bullet oot a rifle
Haud yer bum tight to the chair
to try an stop the leakin air
Shoogle yersel fae cheek to cheek
An pray tae god it disnae leak
Oot it comes like a clap o` thunder
Ricochets aroon the room michty me like a sonic boom
God aw michty it fairly reeks,hope I huvnae shit ma breeks!!!

Just let rip JD

Aye, marvellous stuff fae the Bard there Irn!!


Let's get the farty started eh?!!   

  

Irn Bru wrote:

Joy Division wrote:


Aye, marvellous stuff fae the Bard there Irn!!


Let's get the farty started eh?!!   

  

With they Corale baked beans out of Aldi.

I've never tried them but I wonder where they rank on the fartometer scale?

victorisnotamused wrote:

Irn Bru wrote:

With they Corale baked beans out of Aldi.

I've never tried them but I wonder where they rank on the fartometer scale?

about force 11

Ben_Reilly wrote:My favorite trick has always been the Elevator Trap.

You're on an elevator by yourself, usually heading down. Rip one a few floors before the ground floor and pace quickly off, savoring the fact that everyone getting on at the ground floor is trapped with your biological weapon for the duration of their trip ...     

Catman wrote:

Ben_Reilly wrote:My favorite trick has always been the Elevator Trap.

You're on an elevator by yourself, usually heading down. Rip one a few floors before the ground floor and pace quickly off, savoring the fact that everyone getting on at the ground floor is trapped with your biological weapon for the duration of their trip ...     

You sound more like Dean/Flop on a daily basis!   

Ben_Reilly wrote:My favorite trick has always been the Elevator Trap.

You're on an elevator by yourself, usually heading down. Rip one a few floors before the ground floor and pace quickly off, savoring the fact that everyone getting on at the ground floor is trapped with your biological weapon for the duration of their trip ...     

Catman wrote:

Ben_Reilly wrote:My favorite trick has always been the Elevator Trap.

You're on an elevator by yourself, usually heading down. Rip one a few floors before the ground floor and pace quickly off, savoring the fact that everyone getting on at the ground floor is trapped with your biological weapon for the duration of their trip ...     

You sound more like Dean/Flop on a daily basis!   

Joy Division wrote:

Catman wrote:

You sound more like Dean/Flop on a daily basis!   

Phil's, he's only talking about farting ffs!!  

Catman wrote:

Joy Division wrote:


Phil's, he's only talking about farting ffs!!  

...Perhaps i'm, over analysis of things!

 :-:bravo:-: :-:cawg:-: 

Joy Division wrote:

Catman wrote:

...Perhaps i'm, over analysis of things!

 :-:bravo:-: :-:cawg:-: 

..just a tad Phil   

Catman wrote:

Joy Division wrote:

Catman wrote:

...Perhaps i'm, over analysis of things!

 :-:bravo:-: :-:cawg:-: 

..just a tad Phil   

Well posts have been removed this evening, so perhaps it's good thing to be over analysis of things.

Ben_Reilly wrote:

Catman wrote:

Well posts have been removed this evening, so perhaps it's good thing to be over analysis of things.

What posts?

Catman wrote:

Ben_Reilly wrote:

Catman wrote:

Well posts have been removed this evening, so perhaps it's good thing to be over analysis of things.

What posts?

Oh...Do fuck off!   

Joy Division wrote:

Catman wrote:

Ben_Reilly wrote:My favorite trick has always been the Elevator Trap.

You're on an elevator by yourself, usually heading down. Rip one a few floors before the ground floor and pace quickly off, savoring the fact that everyone getting on at the ground floor is trapped with your biological weapon for the duration of their trip ...     

You sound more like Dean/Flop on a daily basis!   

Phil's, he's only talking about farting ffs!!  

Cass wrote:Lets watch the potty mouths fellas........there are ladies present....

I am married to a gaseous man......the elevator,  the Dutch oven, the trapped in the car with the windows locked and of course the always favourite in the grocery store aisle then casually sauntering away leaving me on the floor. Sadly both the juniors think its funny and play along too......oh my life....


Hey ben junior junior gone off to his first prom tonight.....I'm a tad emotional....

Ben_Reilly wrote:

Cass wrote:Lets watch the potty mouths fellas........there are ladies present....

I am married to a gaseous man......the elevator,  the Dutch oven, the trapped in the car with the windows locked and of course the always favourite in the grocery store aisle then casually sauntering away leaving me on the floor. Sadly both the juniors think its funny and play along too......oh my life....


Hey ben junior junior gone off to his first prom tonight.....I'm a tad emotional....

En serio? My goodness, I can just imagine! I have no kiddos of my own but yeah, I can see how that would be so bittersweet.

I was born into a proud line of men who make fart jokes, it's just a guy thing. Apparently one of my grandfathers used to delight in grasping the table, hiking one leg, and ...

Cass wrote:

Ben_Reilly wrote:

Cass wrote:Lets watch the potty mouths fellas........there are ladies present....

I am married to a gaseous man......the elevator,  the Dutch oven, the trapped in the car with the windows locked and of course the always favourite in the grocery store aisle then casually sauntering away leaving me on the floor. Sadly both the juniors think its funny and play along too......oh my life....


Hey ben junior junior gone off to his first prom tonight.....I'm a tad emotional....

En serio? My goodness, I can just imagine! I have no kiddos of my own but yeah, I can see how that would be so bittersweet.

I was born into a proud line of men who make fart jokes, it's just a guy thing. Apparently one of my grandfathers used to delight in grasping the table, hiking one leg, and ...

Yeah hes a junior so really only one more year left at home....I always said I would throw a party when they had both gone but....well....sniff....but on the other hand senior is home this weekend and brought hike dirty laundry and has informed us he will be needing the garage to take off his wheels and spray them......grrrrrr

My boys need to carry health hazards especially after Indian food....it really gets quite unpleasant .....

Ben_Reilly wrote:

Joy Division wrote:


Phil's, he's only talking about farting ffs!!  

It's all right JD -- I've seen Catman turn on pretty much everyone, and I don't consider myself special in any way. If you get on his radar, you can pretty much bet that he's going to spray his venom at you at some point.

Cass wrote:Lets watch the potty mouths fellas........there are ladies present....

I am married to a gaseous man......the elevator,  the Dutch oven, the trapped in the car with the windows locked and of course the always favourite in the grocery store aisle then casually sauntering away leaving me on the floor. Sadly both the juniors think its funny and play along too......oh my life....


Hey ben junior junior gone off to his first prom tonight.....I'm a tad emotional....

Nems wrote:

Cass wrote:Lets watch the potty mouths fellas........there are ladies present....
I am married to a gaseous man......the elevator,  the Dutch oven, the trapped in the car with the windows locked and of course the always favourite in the grocery store aisle then casually sauntering away leaving me on the floor. Sadly both the juniors think its funny and play along too......oh my life....
Hey ben junior junior gone off to his first prom tonight.....I'm a tad emotional....

I was thinking about him before ! Hope it all went brilliant xx
Farting = tremendous fun, anyone can do it and its free.
My son who is 13, I swear sometimes he sounds like a motorbike.
The bestest is the dog though when she is asleep an farts herself awake

Cass wrote:Ok weird....those annoying adds up top ^^^^^well one just said woorried about gas? Bloating?  Then use this pill blab blah.

Freaky

Joy Division wrote:

Cass wrote:
Ok weird....those annoying adds up top ^^^^^well one just said woorried about gas? Bloating?  Then use this pill blab blah.

Freaky

 

Cass, I've searched for Volvo cars to have a nosey at before online , then up comes an ad for the new Volvo V40 on here!!

Had it with a few things btw!

Joy Division wrote:

 

Cass, I've searched for Volvo cars to have a nosey at before online , then up comes an ad for the new Volvo V40 on here!!

Had it with a few things btw!